JANE EYRE - ESSAY FEEDBACK

 

AS ENGLISH LITERATURE

JANE EYRE – GENERAL FEEDBACK TIMED ESSAY

‘Though restrained by social convention, the passions of the female characters emerge with great force.’

In the light of this comment, discuss Bronte’s presentation of the female characters in Jane Eyre.

·         General points about the essay

·         Answer the broad range of the question

·         Write clearly simply accurately

·         Write and use a plan

·         Aim to write 3 / 4 sides

·         Avoid clichés and hackneyed expressions

·         Always use a formal academic register

·         Don’t waste time writing out the question

·         Identify key quotations for each main paragraph you write. See analytical paragraph template below.

·         Specific points about Jane

·         Jane is a woman of passion

·         Refer to Jane’s plainness

·         Refer to the traditional role of women in Victorian society

·         Refer to feminist ideas

·         Refer to the stereotypical presentation of women either as eve – Bertha  or Mary – Helen this will need explanation

·         Refer to Jane striving for independence power equality

Analytical paragraph

FEATURE	EXPLANATION
Make a point	Make a clear, straightforward, simple and accurate point
Introduce quotation and / or expand on detail of main point	Clearly state where in the text the quotation is from – action not chapter. If you need to expand in detail on your main point.
Quotation	Quote short, relevant phrases. Avoid sentences.
General point	Show how the quotation supports the point you made at the start of the paragraph.
Literary point	Identify a literary feature in the quotation
Effect	And comment on the effect on the reader
Context	Within the body of the essay you should comment on the context of the novel.
Perspective	Within the body of the essay you should comment on a perspective – like feminism.

Main female characters

These are the main female characters in Jane Eyre. I would expect an essay on female characters to include references to these characters.

Mrs Reed	Helen - angel	Miss Temple
Blanche Ingram, Eliza, Georgina	Jane	Diana / Mary / Miss Oliver
	Bertha - devil

JANE EYRE - TEMPLATE PARAGRAPH

AS ENGLISH LITERATURE

JANE EYRE – PARAGRAPHS

Below is a template for a Jane Eyre paragraph.

No:	FEATURE	EXAMPLE	COMMENT
1	Make a point	Write a clear, simple and accurate topic sentence that addresses the essay title	Throughout the novel Jane strives for equality and control over her life.
2	Expand on point	Develop the point made above by adding some detail to the point	She eventually gains equality and power over her life at the end of the novel.
3	Introduce quotation	Clearly show the reader where in the novel the quotation will come from and what actually precedes the quotation	Commenting on her marriage to Rochester she says
4	Quote	Your quotation should be short and relevant. Choose quotations where you can write a lot	“I am my husband’s life as fully as he is mine”
5	General comment – address point 1	Show how the quotation supports or proves the main point made in [1]	This statement defines her as a wife of a wealthy man who has considerable status despite the difficulties he faces. She is defined as an equal partner in this relationship.
6	Literary point	Identify a literary or language feature used in your quotation	The quotation echoes the language of the marriage service. It is a strong, assertive declarative sentence. That claims possession of her husband.
7	Effect of literary feature	Identify the intended response of the literary feature on a reader	We feel a sense of fulfilment in Jane’s development in the novel. We recognise her struggles and feel satisfied and pleasure in her newly discovered position.
8	Contextual comment	Within the scope of the essay you should make one or two relevant  contextual points	We can understand and appreciate this relationship today. However during Victorian times wives were generally seen as the possession of their husbands. Women were totally dependent economically, religiously and socially. Their status and identity were defined by men.
9	Critical voices	Within the scope of the essay you should make one or two relevant  criticisms from another writer
10	Theoretical perspective	Within the scope of the essay you should make one or two relevant  theoretical points	This relationship challenges the conventional views of women seen during the Victorian period. Bronte creates Jane as dynamic, assertive, emotionally, mentally and psychologically strong.
11	Alternative interpretations	Within the scope of the essay you should make one or two relevant  alternative interpretations  of the quotation

STREETCAR - COMMENTS ON TIMED WORK

STREETCAR COMMENTS ON TIMED WORK

This post contains feedback notes on a timed production answer set as homework. It also includes an extract from a model answer with some comments.

I hope you find it helpful

TASK

Stella goes into labour and is taken to hospital at the end of Scene Eight. After Stella has given birth successfully a nurse on her ward notices that she does not seem as happy as she might and asks her what is wrong. Write the dialogue between Stella and the nurse as Stella talks about her concerns for her sister.

Give careful consideration to your language choices, form and style, in order to convey a sense of Stella’s voice. You should use dramatic dialogue form.

CONSIDER

·         You should aim to use two or three stage directions. Use them to comment on a tone of voice – normally placed in brackets after the name of the person about to speak. And stage directions placed on a separate line showing setting and action

·         Stella must dominate text – the nurse is used to trigger Stella’s thoughts and ideas. I think it would be much easier for you if you presented Stella as bursting with things to say rather than have the nurse desperately trying to get Stella to speak.

·         This is a challenging task. You are showing the examiner that you know and understand this play well. To do this well you must communicate Stella’s concerned, guilty, hopeful, sympathetic, attitudes towards her sister as well as showing  her love and support for Stanley.

PLANNING / CONTEXT

Below are some observations I’ve made about Stella’s situation and state of mind at the point the monologue begins. These observations will form the basis for Stella’s dialogue

·         Stella may be concerned for Blanche in Laurel alone –abandoned / Stella’s guilt. Refer to scene 1/7/8

·         Stella may speculate on Mitch’s absence/ his rudeness/Mitch’s mothers’ health/ what Stanley has said about what he has found out. Refer to scene 8

·         Stella may have doubts about Stanley. For example will he make a good father? He plays cards, goes bowling, can be violent and drunk. Refer to scene 4

·         Stella may be concerned about Blanch flirting with Stanley. Refer to scene 2

·         Stella may comment on the cramped apartment scene 1/3/7

·         She may feel relieved that Blanche will go or she may feel disappointed that there will be no one to help her with the baby in the first few weeks

·         Stella may feel the stress levels will improve

·         Stella may realise that Stanley thinks everything is going to be like it was before Blanche arrived. But life is never going to be the same again with a baby. Scene 7/8

EXTRACT OF AN ANSWER

[A single room in a maternity ward of a hospital. It is very late the same night. Stella is in bed. She is alone and awake. A night nurse is doing the rounds.]

Stella                     Nurse! Excuse me! Nurse! Can I just talk to you a moment.

Nurse                    Sure honey. Let me just put my things down. That baby isn’t gonna arrive for a while yet. There’s plenty of time to talk.

[She pulls up a chair. As she sits down Stella grabs at her arm as if she’s in pain.]

Stella                     I’ve just gotta talk to someone.  I’m really worried. It’s my sister. Oh God! I don’t know what’s going to become of her. My husband’s told her to leave. They don’t get on and she nowhere to go. [Pauses and wipes a tear from her eyes]

                                You know the place is so cramped. You can hear practically everything anybody does in the next room or upstairs. My sister’s just not used to living like that. She’s used to servants and space and everything neat and tidy. But the apartment is so small. But now with the baby they’ll be no room. [Pauses again to catch her breath]

                                We hoped she was gonna marry but I don’t think so now. Mitch was the best thing that’s happened to Blanche for years but I reckon he’s gone. Stanley – my husband has seen to that. Spreading a load of gossip and lies. So now she has nothing. [She talks half to herself] I wonder where he’s got to. Maybe his mother’s ill again. Yes that’s probably it! It’s his mother.

Nurse                    Now there honey! Don’t you get yourself upset. You calm down now d’ you hear me. That baby’s gonna need you strong when he arrives.

Stella                     Yes! Yes! I know. But you don’t understand. When she needed me the most, when they were all old and dying I just left her. I abandoned her! I just left for the city. [Pauses. She cries uncontrollably. Then suddenly stops]

                                And now………[she wipes tears from her eyes] I’m having a baby. I’m abandoning her again. I feel so awful. I just can’t let her go back to Laurel - that awful place – alone.

COMMENTS

Below are eight key quotations from the extract above and some basic comments showing how I’ve used the quotations to embed or link the extract to the play.

	QUOTATION	COMMENT
1	My husband’s told her to leave	Refers to scene 8 of the play
2	You can hear practically everything anybody does in the next room or upstairs	Refers to scene 3 where Blanche and Stella are laughing in the back bedroom as Stella talks about hearing Steve and Eunice upstairs. Stella’s statement reinforces the idea that the apartment is too small and there is not enough room for them all to live comfortably.
3	We hoped she was gonna marry but I don’t think so now.	Refers to the dialogue between Blanche and Stella near the end of scene 5 where Blanche states she hopes her relationship with Mitch will lead to marriage. It also picks up the end of scene 6 where Mitch indicates their relationship is serious and will lead to marriage.
4	You know the place is so cramped	See note 2 above
5	Maybe his mother’s ill again	Refers to scene 3 where Mitch tells Blanche about his mother and tells the men around the poker table about his mother.
6	When she needed me the most, when they were all old and dying I just left her.	Refers to scene 1 where Blanche accuses Stella of abandoning her in Belle Reve to cope with the loss of the building and the deaths of family members.
7	I just can’t let her go back to Laurel - that awful place – alone	See note 6 above. It also reflects what Blanche said about  Elysian Fields when she first arrives in scene 1.
8	I’m abandoning her again.	See note 6 & 7 above

JANE EYRE - JANE / ROCHESTER CONTRASTS

AS ENGLISH LITERATURE

JANE EYRE – JANE AND ROCHESTER CONTRASTS AND OPPOSITIONS

A way of looking at the relationship between Rochester and Jane is to consider the many oppositions and contrasts that exist between them both. These contrasts help make an interesting and dynamic text to read.  These characteristics may also be supported by the gender roles of men and women in the society the novel was written in.

JANE	QUOTATION / REFERENCE / CONTEXT / COMMENT	ROCHESTER	QUOTATION / REFERENCE / CONTEXT / COMMENT
Innocence		Experience
Youth		Age
Honesty		Dishonesty
Poverty		Wealth
Servant		Master
Female		Male
Powerless		Powerful