Thursday, 21 May 2015

A2 LL - CUPCAKES RECAST FORMATS - DOCUMENTARY RADIO SCRIPTS

A2 LANGUAGE AND LITERATURE
ELLA 3 INTEGRATED ANALYSIS AND TEXT ADAPTATION


RECAST FORMATS - Radio script
Definition: A radio documentary or feature is a purely acoustic performance devoted to covering a particular topic in some depth, usually with a mixture of commentary and sound pictures. It is broadcast on radio or published on audio media, such as tape or CD.
Example of radio documentary script
PASSAIC ON STRIKE (2006)
NARRATOR: FEW PEOPLE ARE STILL AROUND TO REMEMBER, BUT IN 1926, INPASSAIC NEW JERSEY, 16 THOUSAND WOOLWORKERS STRUCK THEMILLS AFTER THEIR MEAGER WAGES HAD BEEN CUT. THE STRIKELASTED NEARLY A YEAR. SUPPORTERS ACROSS THE NATION SENT MONEY AND FOOD.
 MARTHA STONE ASHER: At one time these strikers who were handling a big truck filled with food were stopped by the police, and they arrested him and they arrested all the bread! ยต . And it became a big issue among the strikers until the bread was freed. (She laughs.) That’s how they talked about it.
NARRATOR: THE 19 TWENTIES ROARED ALRIGHT, BUT NOT THE WAY MOST PEOPLETHINK. COMING UP AFTER THE NEWS, A DOCUMENTARY: PASSAIC ON STRIKE!
Instrumental of  'in'TWe Got Fun'
THE BATTLEGROUND
FUNDING ANNOUNCER: THE FOLLOWING PROGRAM IS A CO-PRODUCTION OF NJN PUBLIC RADIO AND THE NEW JERSEY HISTORICAL COMMISSION. FUNDING FOR THISPROGRAM WAS PROVIDED BY THE NEW JERSEY COUNCIL FOR THEHUMANITIES, A STATE PARTNER OF THE NATIONAL ENDOWMENT FORTHE HUMANITIES, AND THE HISTORICAL COMMISSION. THE VIEWSEXPRESSED IN THIS PROGRAM DO NOT NECESSARILY REFLECT THOSEOF THE COUNCIL, THE HISTORICAL COMMISSION OR NEW JERSEY NETWORK.
Street ambiance. Crowd scene. Milling crowd, a bit threatening. At a distance. Car doors being slammed. A tiny little bit of talking.
JOHN DOS PASSOS: At the place where the meeting was going to be forbidden the people from New
York got out of the shiny sedans of various makes. The sheriff was a fat man with a badge like a star off a Christmas tree. The cops were waving their clubs about, limbering up their arms .³All right move  ‘em along,´ said the sheriff. The people who had come from New York climbed back into the shiny sedans of various makes and drove away. The procession went back the way it had come, down empty streets, past endless facades of deserted mills, past brick tenements with ill-painted stoops, past groups of squat square women with yellow gray faces, groups of men and boys, standing still, saying nothing, looking nowhere, square hands hanging at their sides, people square and still, chunks of yellow gray stone at the edge of a quarry, idle, waiting, on strike. John Dos Passos.
DEE GARRISON: Well, the nineteen twenties is presented as a time of gayety and short skirts and short hair and lots of women dancing around Like, people were supposed to have had money and fun. But the reality of the twenties is that it was a very huge gap between the rich and the poor.
[Bring up music and lyrics again.]
There’s nothing purer, the rich get richer and the poor get children. In the meantime, in between time, ain’t we got fun.
NARRATOR: THE 1920’S ROARED ALRIGHT, WITH THE SIREN OF INJUSTICE. THE REDSCARE, LYNCHINGS, AND THE LABOR WARS.NOWHERE WAS THIS BATTLE, BETWEEN THE HAVES AND HAVE NOTSMORE BRUTAL THAN IN PASSAIC, NEW JERSEY 15 MILES WEST OFMANHATTAN. HERE, IN 1926, 16 THOUSAND WOOLWORKERS WALKEDOUT AFTER THEIR MEAGER WAGES HAD BEEN CUT 10%. IT WAS A LONGSTRIKE -- NEARLY A YEAR -- AND IT CAUGHT THE ATTENTION OF INTELLECTUALS AND ACTIVISTS NATIONWIDE. OVER THE HARSHWINTER OF 1926, PASSAIC BECAME A BATTLEGROUND, NOT JUSTBETWEEN WORKERS AND BOSSES, BUT BETWEEN THE TRADITIONALTRADE UNIONS AND A RENEGADE ORGANIZER IN THE AMERICANCOMMUNIST PARTY, WHO ENVISIONED A MILITANT, INDUSTRIAL UNIONFOR ALL WORKERS.
NOW THE STORY OF.´PASSAIC ON STRIKE!
JIM SHENTON: I was born in Passaic. I lived either in Passaic or in Clifton most of my life.
[Eastern European music begins.]

NARRATOR: THE LATE JAMES SHENTON WAS A LEGENDARY HISTORIAN ANDTEACHER AT COLUMBIA UNIVERSITY. HE ONCE RECALLED THATIMMIGRANT CULTURE WAS SO STRONG IN PASSAIC, NEW JERSEY. ITWAS LIKE LIVING IN EASTERN EUROPE.
 
JAMES SHENTON: My grandmother -- who came in 1878 and died in 1931 -- never learned to speak English. She didn’t have to. She could speak Hungarian, because that was partof the fact of being born in Hungary, Slovak -- if you know Slovak, you more or less know Czech you knew Polish. She picked up German. By the time she got here, she knew enough languages that English was sort of an impediment. In away, it becomes a world in which the stalla babbas -- the old women -- the old grandmas -- wearing the babushkas -- was part of the normal life of this town. My mother’s family came from the area of Slovakia which is called the Spisarea. This was an area that had apparently some kind of influx of Germans, and it was an area of what was then the Kingdom of Hungary in which wool production wasan aspect of their daily lives.
 
NARRATOR: IN PASSAIC DAILY LIFE WAS DOMINATED BY TWO WOOLEN MILLS-- THE BOTANY AND THE FORSTMANN AND HUFFMANN, BOTH GERMANOWNED. IN 1890 CONGRESS HAD PASSED A TARIFF THAT MADE ITPROHIBITIVELY EXPENSIVE TO IMPORT WOOL, SO THE GERMANSOPENED MILLS HERE.
 
JIM SHENTON: When World War One began, the Alien Custodian Commission seized control of the factories that were German-owned
 
NARRATOR: AND WHO EXACTLY WAS PUT IN CHARGE?
 
JAMES SHENTON:  American officers. When World War One ended, Colonel Charles Johnston, who had been in charge of the Botany Woollen Mills, effectively began fighting to gain control. The Germans began fighting for regaining control, and this began to reflect itself in working conditions. The working class got caught in between in these fights. Wages began to come down, and this is where it gets really uneasy. The Bolshevik element came in. And the CP became a fact of life in this area.
 
[The Red Army singing ³ The Internationale.´]
NARRATOR: IN THE WAKE OF THE 1917 BOLSHEVIK REVOLUTION IN RUSSIA, THEFLEDGLING COMMUNIST PARTY IN AMERICA, THE CP, OFFERED AN ALTERNATE VISION FOR THE WORKING CLASS IN PASSAIC. TO THEUNASSIMILATED IMMIGRANTS, COMMUNISM WAS NOT A FRIGHTENINGFOREIGN IDEOLOGY, RATHER A WAY TO GAIN CONTROL OF THEIRLIVES. THE RED SCARE DIDN¶T SCARE THEM.
 
PAUL BUHLE: There was a tremendous wave of government-inspired, but also conservative, propaganda.
NARRATOR: PAUL BUHLE, SENIOR LECTURER IN AMERICAN CIVILIZATION AT BROWN UNIVERSITY.under which the Russian Revolution, for instance, was described as having nationalized women, and which the atheistic quality of the new Russian leadership was played up as an attack on God. And through which all respectable, God-fearing and monogamous Americans were told that they had to resist Communism, because otherwise there would be God-less triumph and no sexual morality.
 
NARRATOR: MANY YOUTHFUL AMERICAN IDEALISTS WHOSE SYMPATHIES LAY WITHLOW-PAID WORKERS DIDN’T BUY THE RED SCARE, EITHER. SOME JOINED THE YOUNG COMMUNIST LEAGUE.
RADIO DOCUMENTARY SCRIPT - SOME USEFUL TIPS TO USE
 
Voice
 
Use more than one voice.
I’d recommend an announcer / main presenter and a second voice.

Two typical structures:
                A – divide the script into two voices. One voice presenting one subject and voice two presenting a second subject. For example, speaker A presents Bill Gates’s private life and biography and speaker two presents Bill Gates’s professional life. I’d recommend that the two voices present short presentations each and then repeat until complete.
                B – divide the script into two voices using an interview format. One voice the interviewer and a second voice the interviewee. It’s really important to have the interviewer ask short simple open questions that enables the interviewee to present all or most of the relevant information from the source text.
Layout
Most radio scripts have the page divided into two columns. The first column is used to identify who is speaking and the second column contains the script. Sometimes rows are inserted to add sound effects or music or voice overs. You could easily present your script like this

 

 

Jeremy Paxman [Interviewer]

So David, in your opinion, how do A Level students survive their exams?

David Loffman

[interviewee]

Preparation and practice are the two most important factors in a successful exam period.

Jeremy Paxman [Interviewer]

I know that you’ve been a successful lecturer now for 28 years. Could you tell our listeners some practical advice about how to prepare and practice for their exams.

David Loffman

[interviewee]

Well students often feel out of control when facing exams. They often feel that it is a process in which something unpleasant is being done to them and that they are powerless  and quite passive.
  
It is right that they are going to experience a relatively short period of time of intense prescribed activity where they have very rigid and limited choices to make. But I feel they should take every opportunity to control as much of the situation they can.

Jeremy Paxman [Interviewer]

Like what for example

David Loffman

[interviewee]

Students can write an exam time table. For example allocating specific time to particular activities. For example, at 9.30 read the SECTION B question and annotate the extract. At 9.45 write a bullet point plan based on the question and annotations. At 9.50 write the recast task. At 10.10 plan the commentary and at 10.15 write your commentary. Then at 10.30 read the SECTION A question……..


Conventions

Use a maximum of two sound effects in your recast text. Perhaps use one at the beginning and one at the end of your extract. Remember that you are being assessed on your use of written language; however one very clear way of getting marks is to identify the genre of a recast text. One straight forward way of achieving this is to adopt its layout and the conventions - a way in which something is usually done. By quoting the conventions of a recast text you will be preparing for a good commentary paragraph. For example
 
Conventions / Speaker
Text
Voice of invigilator announcing the start of an exam. Sound of shuffling students /  papers
The time is now 9.30 this exam lasts two and a half hours. You can turn over the question paper now
Jeremy Paxman – [Presenter]
Well it’s that time of year again where all over the country students are sitting their exams. I have with me in the studio today……..

Commentary extract

I used a recording of the start of an exam to draw the listener’s attention to the subject matter of the documentary. I wrote this declarative in note form because it’s part of the convention of radio script writing, ‘Sound of shuffling students /  papers’ to make the programme sound realistic and to add tension for the listeners. I thought the sound effects would draw their attention.

Have a look at the way sound effects are used in the example documentary script I’ve reproduced.

But remember not to spend very much time on the layout and conventions. It says in the assessment objectives, ‘Convincing use of form with sustained evidence of audience and purpose being addressed. ‘ The term ‘form’ here relates to layout and conventions. The references to ‘audience and purpose’ will be dealt with using language.

I think if you use the margin in the answer book of the exam to place conventions and speaker information , that would be enough.

SOME FOLLOW UP WORK

RADIO SCRIPTS - Read the example radio script above and identify conventions, key features, identify how the text addresses audience and purpose, uses genre conventions and creates specific effects from an audience.

KEY FEATURES - RADIO SCRIPTS can include a really wide range of different formats, audiences, purposes and topics. For gthe purpose of the exam simplicity is the best policy to adopt where possible. Don't worry too much about how the script looks but really try and communicate specifically to an audience, adopting the basic format ideas referred to above using the appropriate purpose. Remember the content of the source article is the primary information to be addressed.


CONVENTIONS – a way in which something is usually done –such as structure, layout, address heading[s]

COMMENT – on function[s] of the convention within the context of the

TEXT - Link to audience, purpose, genre, wider context, attitudes to topic[s]and topic[s]themselves

EFFECT – identify the intended effect of the CONVENTION on an audience / reader

LANGUAGE FEATURES - identifylanguage and literary features common to RADIO SCRIPTS. Find a good quotation - short and contains strong language features - comment on these and show effects on readers.

FOLLOW UP

READ and become familiar with RADIO SCRIPTS. You will find many examples online. They are usually relatively short, accessible and on interesting topics. Avoid drama scripts and focus on documentaries.

Identify a 300 - 400 extract and identify conventions, language features, good quotations, make brief comments about function of the language feature and on effects on readers.



Click here for a link to website about scripting radio documentaries. It's not written for us but it does include some useful information.

Click here for a link to a Cupcakes post that asks you to write a radio documentary script.

Tuesday, 19 May 2015

IB ENGLISH SL EXAM AND COMMENTARY ARRANGEMENTS

The Exam

The arrangements for the IB SL English exam are as follows:

The exam will take place on Monday 8 June in room 1E1 at 9.00. It is a two hour exam and you should expect to arrive for the exam at least 10 minutes before the exam is due to start.

The exam consists of two questions. You should expect to spend an hour per question.

One question will be on Othello. You must answer the question with close detailed analysis to the extract provided.

The second question will be on The Great Gatsby. You must answer the question with close detailed analysis to the extract provided.

The purpose of the exam is to give students practical experience of sitting an IB English exam. The model of this exam will be similar to the oral commentary you will be doing at the end of this academic year as well as giving you some experience of the exam questions you will experience next summer.

The exam result will help - along with other assessments - to allocate a predicted grade in English for students.

Some Links

Below are some links to posts you might find helpful in preparing for the exam [and commentary].

Click here for the basics about the exam and analysis.

Click here and here for terms you can use in your analysis.

Click here for further details of terms you can use for your analysis.

Click here and here and here for some examples of analytical paragraphs. Consider the structure of these rather than the actual content of the paragraphs.

The Commentary

The arrangements for the IB SL English commentary will be posted here as details are finalised:

The commentaries will take place in the last teaching week of the year. The week beginning 22nd June. The commentaries will take place over two days between Tuesday 23 - Thursday 25 June.

You will be given the extract by an exam assistant and shown to a room where you can prepare your presentation independently and without interruption by annotating the text and making a plan.

Students will have 20 minutes to prepare a 10 minute presentation  - including some follow up questions from me; on a specific extract either from Othello or The Great Gatsby. The presentation must include a close detailed analysis of the extract provided.

The commentary will be recorded, marked, internally moderated and then some recordings will be externally moderated by the IB. Marks from the commentary out of 30 - 15% of your overall English grade and presentation - marked out of 30 - 15% of your overall English grade - will be carried forward into the second year assessment of the course - 70% of your overall English grade.

A2 ENGLISH LANGUAGE AND LITERATURE - ARRANGEMENTS AFTER HALF TERM

Classes will continue after half term although there will be no formal register's taken.

I will continue to be avalable to meet and discuss exam issues with you. I'll bring to class or post selected material on the blog covering topics including looking at spoken language transcripts, spoken language terminology,language and literary technical terms, recast formats and recast commentaries.

i'll put all work i've marked into my tray in 1D11 and I will continue to mark work that students hand in. The marked work can be picked up from my tray in 1D11. These can be picked up at any time or collected from me during a lesson where you might get some 1:1 feedback. I'll put the marked work in labelled folders with module and student details on the cover.

If you want me to address a specific topic for the exam then let me know and we'll discuss it in class. If you email me in good time before hand I can prepare materials, I expect.

Remember to read the comments and check the blog for specific feedback.

Don't forget to use the blog for recast questions and tips for the three way comparison and the recast task.

Use your time wisely.

David

Monday, 18 May 2015

IB COMMENTARY QUESTION AND EXTRACT

How is Tom presented in this extract from the novel?

And so it happened that on a warm windy evening I drove over to East Egg to see two old friends whom I scarcely knew at all. Their house was even more elaborate than I expected, a cheerful red-and-white Georgian Colonial mansion, overlooking the bay. The lawn started at the beach and ran toward the front door for a quarter of a mile, jumping over sun-dials and brick walks and burning gardens — finally when it reached the house drifting up the side in bright vines as though from the momentum of its run. The front was broken by a line of French windows, glowing now with reflected gold and wide open to the warm windy afternoon, and Tom Buchanan in riding clothes was standing with his legs apart on the front porch.

He had changed since his New Haven years. Now he was a sturdy straw-haired man of thirty with a rather hard mouth and a supercilious manner. Two shining arrogant eyes had established dominance over his face and gave him the appearance of always leaning aggressively forward. Not even the effeminate swank of his riding clothes could hide the enormous power of that body — he seemed to fill those glistening boots until he strained the top lacing, and you could see a great pack of muscle shifting when his shoulder moved under his thin coat. It was a body capable of enormous leverage — a cruel body.

His speaking voice, a gruff husky tenor, added to the impression of fractiousness he conveyed. There was a touch of paternal contempt in it, even toward people he liked — and there were men at New Haven who had hated his guts.

“Now, don’t think my opinion on these matters is final,” he seemed to say, “just because I’m stronger and more of a man than you are.” We were in the same senior society, and while we were never intimate I always had the impression that he approved of me and wanted me to like him with some harsh, defiant wistfulness of his own.

We talked for a few minutes on the sunny porch.

IB COMMENTARY QUESTION AND EXTRACT

Examine this extract and comment on its significance to the novel as a whole. You might like to focus on Nick's reactions to Tom and Jordan.

The Buchanans’ house floated suddenly toward us through the dark rustling trees. Tom stopped beside the porch and looked up at the second floor, where two windows bloomed with light among the vines.

“Daisy’s home,” he said. As we got out of the car he glanced at me and frowned slightly.

“I ought to have dropped you in West Egg, Nick. There’s nothing we can do to-night.”

A change had come over him, and he spoke gravely, and with decision. As we walked across the moonlight gravel to the porch he disposed of the situation in a few brisk phrases.

“I’ll telephone for a taxi to take you home, and while you’re waiting you and Jordan better go in the kitchen and have them get you some supper — if you want any.” He opened the door. “Come in.”

“No, thanks. But I’d be glad if you’d order me the taxi. I’ll wait outside.”

Jordan put her hand on my arm.

“Won’t you come in, Nick?”

“No, thanks.”

I was feeling a little sick and I wanted to be alone. But Jordan lingered for a moment more.

“It’s only half-past nine,” she said.

I’d be damned if I’d go in; I’d had enough of all of them for one day, and suddenly that included Jordan too. She must have seen something of this in my expression, for she turned abruptly away and ran up the porch steps into the house. I sat down for a few minutes with my head in my hands, until I heard the phone taken up inside and the butler’s voice calling a taxi. Then I walked slowly down the drive away from the house, intending to wait by the gate.

Friday, 15 May 2015

A2 LL - CUPCAKES QUESTION ON THE SUMMER I LEFT CHILDHOOD WAS WHITE - EDITORIAL

Read the source material from ['I wanted to eat...' on page 111 to '... my father was quite progressive.' on page 112] and answer both questions:

Text A is from an article entitled [The Summer I Left Childhood was White] by [Audre Lorde]. It was first published in the [Zami: A New Spelling of My Name].


Using the article [you have been asked to write an editorial on the injustices of racism. The paper you write for is actively campaigning and supporting civil rights.

Adapt the source material, using your own words as far as possible. Your [editorial] should be approximately 300 – 400 words in length.

In your adaptation you should:
• use language appropriately to address purpose and audience

• write accurately and coherently, applying relevant ideas and concepts.

(25 marks)

AND

Question 3

Write a commentary which explains the choices you made when writing your [editorial]commenting on the following:

• how language and form have been used to suit audience and purpose

• how vocabulary and other stylistic features have been used to shape meaning and
achieve particular effects.

You should aim to write about 150 – 250 words in this commentary.

(15 marks)

Thursday, 14 May 2015

IB ENGLISH - EXAM CHECKLIST

IB ENGLISH
END OF YEAR EXAM

What are the details of the exam?


2 hour exam
1 question on Othello – with one short extract
1 question on Gatsby – with one short extract

I suggest 1 hour per question

· 10 minutes reading annotating extracts – underline key quotations that illustrate important points about the guide question, plot, character, theme, setting etc.

· 5 minutes planning time – organizing thoughts into a series of bullet points generally in the order you will write your answer

· 35 minutes writing the essay – include an introduction, a series of coherent analytical paragraphs followed by a brief concluding statement

· 10 minutes correcting and editing – add new points and correct spelling, grammar and syntax

What am I looking for?

· Close reading and detailed analysis – make a simple point, expand on point in detail, introduce quotation, quote and comment – identify language feature[s] in quote, identify its function and comment on the effect on reader / audience

· Overall knowledge of the characters, plot, themes, setting of the text as a whole – show awareness of events that immediately precede and immediately follow the extract. Identify the significance of details within the extract to events that precede the extract. As well as identify the significance of details within the extract that foreshadows events that follow.

· Ability to address the guide question directly – show an ability to focus on and respond to the topic identified in the guide question

What details should I include in the essay?

Comment on writing styles

· For example: descriptive writing – evoking place, objects character by using modifiers, adjectives, elemental and sensuous lexis, 

· narrative writing – story telling, the gradual unfolding of events with use of flashbacks, flash forwards and present tense narratives, be aware of narrative perspectives 

· dialogue – be aware of formal / informal register and accent [Americanisms], be aware of idiolects, idiomatic language

· action writing – episodes that involve crisis, dominated by verbs and adverbs 

· reflective writing – internal monologues reflecting on episodes and characters, or refection on relevant abstract concepts

 Comment on context

· Refer to where in the text this extract is located

· Refer to relevant episodes that lead up to this extract

· Refer where relevant to cultural, political, social issues linked to the publication of the text

· Refer where relevant to Shakespeare an or Fitzgerald’s life

Comment on character

· Refer to attitudes and motivations that prompt behaviour and speech.

· What do words, actions and other literary features reveal to us about character[s]

Comment on narrator / speaker for example consider such things as

· First or third person narrator

· Biased or trustworthy

· Limited or overall knowledge

 Comment on language features


· Identify language terms – for example consider:

o Grammar – nouns – concrete / abstract / proper nouns, adjectives – superlatives and comparatives, verbs - 

o Syntax - simple, compound and complex sentences as well as declaratives, interrogatives, imperatives and exclamatives

o Register – formal and informal 

o Lexis – low and high frequency lexis, semantic fields, denotation and connotation Imagery - simile, metaphor, personification, symbolism

o Phonology – alliteration, assonance, onomatopoeia, rhyme

o Rhetorical devices – such as comparative / contrasting pairs, direct address, lists of three, repetition,

· What is the function of these techniques within the text

· What is the intended effect on reader / audience

Comment on setting


· How does setting contribute to themes and characters

Wednesday, 13 May 2015

A2 LL CUPCAKES QUESTION - A SPEECH

Read the source material which follows and answer both questions:

Text A is from an article entitled [Everybody Wins and All Must Have Prizes] by [Melanie Phillips]. It was first published in the [Daily Mail in 2003].


Using the article [you have been asked to script a speech urging parents]. to write to their MP demand changes to educational policy. Produce the opening of the speech

Adapt the source material, using your own words as far as possible. Your [speech] should be approximately 300 – 400 words in length.

In your adaptation you should:
• use language appropriately to address purpose and audience

• write accurately and coherently, applying relevant ideas and concepts.

(25 marks)

AND

Question 3

Write a commentary which explains the choices you made when writing your [leaflet]
commenting on the following:

• how language and form have been used to suit audience and purpose

• how vocabulary and other stylistic features have been used to shape meaning and
achieve particular effects.

You should aim to write about 150 – 250 words in this commentary.

(15 marks)

Monday, 11 May 2015

A2 LL - CUPCAKES QUESTION ON REPORT FROM VIETNAM

Read the source material which follows and answer both questions:

Text A is from an article entitled [Report From Vietnam 1: The Home Programme] by [Mary McCarthy]. It was first published in the [New York Review of Books in 1967].


Using the section from 'The war they say,' on page 27 to 'his office headquarters' on page 30, you [have been asked to create a properganda leaflet for the US public, to reassure them that the US presence in Vietnam is a postive force].

Adapt the source material, using your own words as far as possible. Your [leaflet] should be approximately 300 – 400 words in length.

In your adaptation you should:
• use language appropriately to address purpose and audience

• write accurately and coherently, applying relevant ideas and concepts.

(25 marks)

AND

Question 3

Write a commentary which explains the choices you made when writing your [leaflet]
commenting on the following:

• how language and form have been used to suit audience and purpose

• how vocabulary and other stylistic features have been used to shape meaning and
achieve particular effects.

You should aim to write about 150 – 250 words in this commentary.

(15 marks)

Wednesday, 6 May 2015

AS LL - GROUP PLANNING TASK

TASK

In small groups prepare one of the SECTION A Analysis questions below.

Write a detailed plan and share it with the other groups in the class

Spies – Michael Frayn

How does Frayn convey a sense of Stephen’s naivety?
Choose two or three extracts to explore in detail


In your answer you should consider:

• Frayn’s language choices
• narrative viewpoint

Spies – Michael Frayn - January 2013


How does Frayn present Keith's father?
Choose two or three extracts to explore in detail

In your answer you should consider:

• Frayn’s language choices
• narrative viewpoint


A Streetcar Named Desire – Tennessee Williams

Explore how Williams presents the relationship between Stella and Blanche.
Choose two or three extracts to explore in detail


In your answer you should consider:

• Williams’s language choices
• dramatic techniques


A Streetcar Named Desire – Tennessee Williams - January 2013

How does Williams present Blanche’s fantasy and delusion?
Choose two or three extracts to explore in detail.
In your answer you should consider:


  • Williams’s language choices
  • dramatic techniques.

AS LL - ANALYSIS QUESTION - SOME BASICS AND TEMPLATE

SECTION A - ANALYSIS TASK - SOME BASICS

Spend 40 minutes on this section

There are 30 marks available for this part of the exam

I suggest you spend 10 - 15 minutes planning, 20 - 25 minutes writing and 5 - 10 minutes reading, editing and correcting your answer

In the analysis question you are being assessed on your ability to - [AO 1] to show you can choose relevant linguistic and literary concepts and terminology to analyse the text.

15 marks

[AO 2] And your ability to show in detail that you understand and can analyse the ways in which form (the novel), structure (the organisation of events for effect), and language (used in narrative - story telling, descriptive language, dialogue and reflective language - Stephen's internal monologues ) are used to create effects / impact.

15 marks

A TEMPLATE ANSWER

Brief introduction - answer the question in summary - no quotations, jot down a list of the key points you are going to explore in detail in the rest of your answer. Make a summary comment about language features and narrative perspective

Write a series of 3 - 5 analytical paragraphs in which you:
  • make an assertion - an important short simple declarative statement that you feel confident in making that is completely relevant to the question

  • use a good quotation - a word or a phrase that contains at least two language features that you feel confident in identifying

  • identify two or three language features - depending on time limits - choose one or two language features in your quotation and

  • comment on the effect of these on a reader - this could include: feeling sympathy for a character, creating emphasis, highlighting conflict and creating atmosphere

    • comment on narrative viewpoint - you don't have to do this for every paragraph but mention it in your introduction and at least two other paragraphs

Finally write a concluding statement - this will be a sentence or two at most. You can summarise the main points of your answer, make an interesting observation or give a final concluding comment.

Tuesday, 5 May 2015

A2 LL - CUPCAKES QUESTION - WHAT BECAME OF THE FLAPPERS

Read the source material which follows and answer both questions:

Text A is from an article entitled [What Became of the Flappers] by[Zelda Fitzgerald]
It was first published in [Mc Call’s Magazine in October 1925].

You [have been asked to contribute to an encyclopaedia of popular culture by producing an entry on the idea of the Flapper].

Using the source material [as a whole you should] adapt the source material, using your own words as far as possible. Your [encyclopaedia] entry should be approximately 300 – 400 words in length.

In your adaptation you should:
• use language appropriately to address purpose and audience

• write accurately and coherently, applying relevant ideas and concepts.

(25 marks)

AND

Question 3

Write a commentary which explains the choices you made when writing your [text]
commenting on the following:

• how language and form have been used to suit audience and purpose

• how vocabulary and other stylistic features have been used to shape meaning and
achieve particular effects.

You should aim to write about 150 – 250 words in this commentary.

(15 marks)

Monday, 4 May 2015

A2 LL - MOCK EXAM FEEDBACK

A2 LL - MOCK EXAM FEEDBACK

THREE WAY COMPARISON

SOME GENERAL ISSUES

Some positive observations 

  • Most of you used the recommended structure for the commentary and this was used well, generally
  • Most students used a sound core of language and literary features. The best scripts were using between 15 - 20 different features.
  • Students generally drew from language, literary and spoken language frameworks with degrees of confidence
  • Comparing texts for the most was an absolutely embedded feature of your commentaries
  • Commentaries were generally well written with accurate expression and confident use of terminology
  • Most scripts addressed audience, purpose(s), genre, attitude(s) to main topic and identified at least one sub-topic
  • Most scripts commented in detail on the effects of language features on readers / audience
Some negative observations

  • Analysis of texts was mostly sound but rarely insightful and sensitive. For example students did not pick up on Jane's nervousness or anxiety in text A or pick up on the cynical, anger and bitterness of Ben in text C.
  • Only a relatively small number of students made comments about semantic fields. This seemed such an obvious area to explore and all three texts use subject specific lexical choices. Associated with a semantic field of medical conditions is low-frequency lexis and  formal register.
  • Very few scripts commented on the headmaster in text C or identified the dialogue at the start or the imagined dialogue at the end of the extract
  • Referring to contexts was almost completely ignored by most students
  • Identifying audiences is not a formulaic tick box exercise especially for novels. You must be thorough and engaged. For example, 'The audience for the novel may include people interested in discrimination and human rights. Or people interested in injustice or disability.
Some general observations to consider

  • Really pack every line with concise, detailed and relevant points. You can do this by using quotations that have two or three language features that you can confidently comment on in some detail. And then refer to the effects.
  • The most effective quotations are short. A word or a phrase works best.
  • Perhaps we should avoid including - repeating the basic information about texts in the introduction. For example for text A we could write,'Text A is an interactional, private, spontaneous, informal series of adjacency pairs between two work colleagues, discussing the medical condition of one of the speakers.'
  • The examiners expected students to identify gender as a topic to discuss. Text A male and female, text B's lack of gender and text C's male to male gender.
  • Examiners expected students to identify speech in text's A and C; direct address in text B.
  • Examiners expected students to refer to lexical issues including low and high frequency lexis as well as formal and informal registers
  • use detailed language frameworks
    • Text A some observations include: The extract is a series of adjacency pairs, Malcolm sets the agenda, uses back-channelling features to show he understands Jane's explanations, non-fluency features may be an indication of informality or expressions of discomfort and awkwardness about talking about such a sensitive subject. Both speakers use non-fluency features.This may be indicated by the fact the dialogue is set at work and are primarily colleagues - not necessarily close friends.
    • Text B some observations include: 
    • Text C some observations include: What struck me about this extract is the attitude of the narrator / main character to his medical condition and the world generally. He is angry and bitter. This has led to a cynical view of the things. This is expressed through sarcasm and irony. These are examples of dark or black humour. It's entertaining but it's also quite painful.

  • FOLLOW UP TASKS


RECAST TASK AND COMMENTARY

SOME GENERAL POINTS - RECAST TEXT


  • There are 28 recasting questions on this blog. If you practice 3 or 4 of these a week under timed conditions between now and the exam, you will improve your writing and commentary skills. The more you do, the better you will become at writing these two exam tasks. You have the skills and the opportunity to get 40 / 40 for this exam. I will mark any work that you submit to me. It is your responsibility. Act now to transform a D grade into a B grade! It's as simple as that!
  • Include references from the beginning, middle and end sections of the source text
  • Try and include at least two minor or apparently insignificant details from the source text.
  • Over 90% of your recast task must be directly and specifically drawn from the source text. Less than 10% of your recast text should be used to adapt this material to your recast genre.
  • Remember what you are being assessed on. You are being assessed on your ability to 'demonstrate expertise and creativity in using language appropriately for a variety of purposes and audiences, drawing on insights from language and literary studies.' This is a description of the assessment criteria for the recast text.
  • Make sure as you write your recast text include relevant and obvious language / literary features that you can use in your commentary. At first when you practice recasting texts this is awkward and artificial but the more you practice the more natural and easier it will become.
  • Avoid using the same words and phrases as the source article. This is really important. Use synonyms and alternative phrases. Approach the actual language / expression of the recast text creatively and imaginatively.
  • Add a title and sub heading to your text. You can use this to refer to genre and audience.


  •   SOME GENERAL POINTS - COMMENTARY
  • Like the three way comparison use the structure and most of the features in the following list in your recast commentary. Address audience, purpose(s), genre, attitude(s) to topic; then quote relevantly, concisely a quotation from your own recast text, packed with language / literary features, and identify between 10 - 15 language / literary features and comment on the intended effect on readers.
  • Unlike the three way comparison question, this is not a comparison exercise. Just answer the question that's asked, carefully.
  • Refer to between ten and twenty language and literary terms in your commentary
  • Write detailed and concise commentaries.
  • Write a minimum of 150 words. If you have time write more than 250 concise, detailed, language and literary filled words and effects on audiences.
  • Remember what you are being assessed for in the recast commentary question. You are being assessed on your ability to, 'select and apply relevant concepts and approaches from integrated language and literary study, using appropriate terminology and accurate, coherent written expression.'


A MODEL ANSWER

Recast text

'An Unnatural Silence'

A first hand account of life in a Turkish refugee camp in the Uludere Mountains

It was the most awful experience of my life. That first night out in the open with my wife and children was absolutely tortuous. 

The rain pounded on us all night. I can barely bring myself to think about such horror. 

We only had one dirty and smelly blanket for the seven of us, my wife, her mother and aunt, and our three children. We kept the children in the middle of us to stop the rain from falling on them. The blanket just covered us all. But my wife's and my back were saturated by the morning. We tried to sing the children to sleep. We tried to tell them stories. We tried to remind them about our last holiday we had by the sea. But they were so cold and hungry after our three day journey to this barren mountainside. 

What a place! It felt as if we'd been abandoned by God. There was nothing there we could use. There was no natural shelter. There were a few scattered stunted trees but they had been stripped of anything useful when we were there. There was no clean water. There was a small muddy and polluted stream close by and muddy puddles. The place was an open sewer. It got everywhere. It was mixed into the mud

The mud got everywhere! It was in our hair, in our eyes, our clothes and the little food we had. 

In the morning when I got up I saw Turkish soldiers laughing and smoking cigarettes. They had automatic weapons slung over their shoulders and whips in their hands. I saw one turn to a young couple. He was shouting at them and raised his whip. The soldiers are so cruel and unhelpful.

In that grey light of the morning I tried to dig a hole to use as a toilet. But I was pushed away by a family that had settled close by. Beside the ground was to stony and exposed.

But what I remember most about that first morning was the unnatural silence. There were the occasional screams of children. But when those died away there was a strange hush. It was the silence of a defeated, helpless and despairing people that had nowhere to go.

Commentary

I wrote this first hand autobiographical account of life in a Turkish refuge camp to inform the readers of a book chronicling the horrors of the Saddam Hussain regime. I used a direct quotation from the article as the title to give an impression of the content of the article to follow. And the more detailed declarative sub-heading is used to give the reader a context and brief explanation to the article.I imagine my readers would be victims and survivors of his brutal government. And perhaps people sympathetic to the Kurdish campaign for an independent state. It's written also to raise awareness of the plight of the Kurdish people.

I used pre-modifying adjectives to help give vivid detail for example, 'dirty and smelly'. This sensuous language is used to create a realistic and gritty impression of the situation.

I used syntactic parallelisms as a way of generating a strong emotional response from the readers and to emphasise the desperate situation. The repetition of the phrase, 'There was no....' also reinforces the helplessness. The phrase, 'we tried to...' is used to help readers contrast the lives these people lived before they came to the mountainside. It's also used to highlight the vulnerability of the children.

I used short simple declaratives and exclamatives such as, 'What a place!' and 'There was no shelter! to shock readers and draw their attention.


FOLLOW UP TASKS


  • Practice under timed conditions some of the recast question posted elsewhere on this blog
  • Read carefully the recasting guide posted elsewhere on this blog
  • Develop the range of language and literary frameworks and terms to use in your commentary
  • Read over some of the articles we've discussed in class, develop recasting questions of your own and practice writing them under timed conditions.
  • Click here for a link to a post about approaches to the recast task
  • Select 300 - 400 words from a variety of articles we've looked at over the year and write a 250 - 350 word commentary on it. Write it imagining you wrote the source text.
  • And remember - introduction - summary of audience, purpose, genre, attitude to the subject. Then write 3 or 4 paragraphs selecting topics listed above. Make a point, support it with a quotation, identify language features and comment on the effects on an audience. And finally write 2 paragraphs on the topics engaged with in the source text

Tuesday, 28 April 2015

AS LL - FEEDBACK FROM MOCK EXAM

AS ENGLISH LANGUAGE AND LITERATURE
ELLA 1 INTEGRATED ANALYSIS AND TEXT PRODUCTION
MOCK EXAM FEEDBACK

I still have not received mock exam answers from:
Sabrina, Georgia, Brianna, Lloyd, Ibrahim and Amgad.


PRODUCTION TASK

SOME KEY ISSUES

  • Make sure that 90% of your text can be derived from the play
  • Use about 10% of your text adding details to make your text a letter etc.
  • Refer directly to two or three specific episodes from different parts of the text
  • Write clear, straightforward and accurate texts
  • Slip in to the text some American English terms
  • In a question like this there is a temptation to give a rant and just express a variety of emotions. You won't get rewarded for this. Embed your whole answer with obvious and direct relevant references to the text.

A MODEL ANSWER

Imagine that Stella writes to a friend shortly after events at the end of the play. Write this letter, in which Stella explains what has happened with Blanche and reveals her feelings about sending Blanche away.

You should give careful consideration to your language choices and style, which should achieve a sense of Stella's voice.

This was done under timed conditions.

Apartment A
Elysian Fields
Scott Joplin Boulavard
New Orleans

October 1947

Dear Daisy

I've got some awful news. We've had to call doctors and send Blanche - my darling sister - away to a hospital. It's so humiliating for her. I feel guilty because I couldn't help her when she was living at Belle Reve looking after the family, alone. And I couldn't help her while she was staying with us here either. I've really let her down. I feel so helpless.

She's had some kind of breakdown. I think her relationship with Stanley became really difficult. Everytime they were together there was trouble. Like at Blanche's birthday dinner. Stanley was so mad he shouted and started smashing plates against the walls.He was so angry. It was so embarrassing. And he was really cruel. He gave Blanche a coach ticket back to Laurel. Can you believe it? A coach ticket! Have you ever seen Blanche in all your life ever take a coach? really!

But the worst of it is that Blanche claims that Stanley raped her the night Stanley Junior was born. I don't know what to think! She has lied so much since she has been here. She said she'd met Shep Huntleigh last year. She thinks she used to go out with him. She said she'd left work because of ill health. But it turns out she got caught up in a scandal involving a young student. She was fired. She claimed she doesn't drink. But she's been drinking all sorts all summer.

It's been really difficult also dealing with Blanche's fantasy life. Stanley is so impatient and intolerant of her. I think she said something once about Stanley being like an animal and he's not forgiven her. In fact it seems like he has been taking revenge on her ever since and that was months ago.

On top of all this, the man we all thought was going to marry Blanche, didn't turn up for the birthday celebration and has completely broken it off with her. Stanley told him about her drinking and about the scandal with the boy at school. And he wants nothing to do with her anymore.

I feel so awful about all this but I've got no one I can share any of this with properly. The woman upstairs is okay but she does not really understand.

Anyway I hope you don't mind me going on like this

with love

Stella

FOLLOW UP TASKS

  • Re-read the model answer above and identify the different scenes and episodes referred to above
  • Have a go at writing other production questions posted elsewhere on this blog under timed conditions
  • Read through the play and identify about five or six key episodes - between a side or two sides of writing
  • Click here for a link to some popular American terms and consider how you migh use them to capture the voice of the characters in the play

ANALYSIS TASK

SOME KEY ISSUES

  • Write a series of analytical paragraphs. Make a statement, support this statement with a relevant short quotation, identify key language features within the quotation and comment on the effect on a reader / audience
  • To analyse a quotation you must identify language features within the quote and comment on the effect of the language feature on the reader / audience
  • A good quotation is short - a word or a phrase. A sentence is too long. A good quotation has within it language features that you can confidently identify and comment on the effect on a reader or audience.
  • Language features you should be able to identify include
    • Syntax - declarative, interogative, imperative, exclamative
    • Grammar - verbs, nouns, adjectives
    • Lexis - low / high frequency, connotations / denotations
    • Register - formal / informal
    • Imagery - simile, metaphor, personification, pathetic fallacy, symbolism
    • Phonology - alliteration, onomatopoeia, assonance
    • Rhetoric - direct address, lists of three, comparative pairs, emotive lexis
  • Make sure you make clear reference to the narrator's perspective. Consider in what ways the narrator is biased and subjective. The narrator in Spies is interesting because we read the older Stephen's voice and the younger Stephen's voice. The younger narrator is full of ignorance, misunderstanding, partial knowledge. He wants to do the right thing, is completely loyal, law abiding, intelligent, highly imaginative, brave and innocent. 

MODEL ANSWER

This was not written under timed conditions. It is about a third longer than what you would be expected to write in the exam.

How does Frayn present the relationship between Stephen and Keith in Chapters 2 and 3 of the novel?

In your answer you should consider:
  • Frayn's language choices
  • narrative viewpoint

The relationship between Keith and Stephen is a very close one. Both of them are dependent upon each other. However there are stresses and tensions in the friendship and pressures from outside that ultimately destroy it by the end of the novel. We see this relationship mostly through the youthful Stephen's narrative voice. Therefore from this narrative perspective we see the friendship as playful and innocent.

I think the friendship between Stephen and Keith was started and encouraged by Mrs Hayward. She does this to keep Keith occupied through the long summer holiday. So that she can look after Uncle Peter hiding in the Barns. Normally I think these two families or son's would not get on well together. Not only are the Wheatley's foreign, they are also German, and worse still, they are Jewish. Anti-Semitism was a strong feature of middle class British society in the 30's and 40's. They are so completely different. Not only are they a different class but the Hayward's are really snobs. Stephen is unaware of the differences between the two families. This is because his narrative point of view is from a child's perspective. 

But Mrs. Hayward treats Stephen well and often he's invited to tea. This is a way of gaining Stephen's loyalty to her and encouraging the friendship between Stephen and Keith. He thinks, 'what he loved most at Keith's house was being invited to tea.' The emotive lexis 'loved' is powerful and coupled with the superlative 'most' creates a strong emotional bond between Stephen and the Hayward's. He loves their home, their life style and Keith. But Stephen is being manipulated by adult's and Keith right from the beginning. He can't really see this but as adult readers our perspective is different and perhaps more balanced.

Stephen feels gratitude at being in the presence of this family. He feels thankful for their hospitality and attention. After tea he says, ' 'Thank you for having me. Thank you, thank you.' The repetition of this exclamation is used to emphasise the strength of Stephen's feelings of adoration to this family. It's almost as if the Hayward's are royalty compared to Stephen and the others that live in The Close. Stephen's unquestioning devotion to them before the novel begins shows his limited perspective on the relationship and the events of the novel. 

This feeling of the Hayward's superiority over Stephen's inferiority is an important element in their friendship. Keith is the dominant leader and Stephen is the follower or disciple. As they begin their new project of discovering evidence that Keith's mother is a German spy, Stephen thinks, ' I humbly wait for Keith to announce what we're to think and what we're to do.' The adverb 'humbly' clearly shows Stephen's weakness and lower status then Keith. The collective pronoun ' we're' repeated twice is used to emphasise Stephen and Keith's unity of thought and action. Again Stephen cannot see any difference in class between them. But the reader realises that Stephen defers completely to Keith's thoughts and actions.

However as the boys begin their investigation of Mrs Hayward's room in chapter 3, we can see differences between them. Keith is presented as immoral and is happy to explore his mother's private things. Where as Stephen is moral and respectful. He says to Keith as they look at her diary, 'But if it's something private...., I plead.' The adjective 'private' is used powerfully here to emphasise the importance of their mission. It's also used to show that they are breaking social rules and conventions. And the verb 'plead' is used to show Stephen's timidity, his deference to authority but also his loyalty to the woman who has treated him so well. Perhaps it shows a childlike and immature response to an awkward and uncomfortable situation.

But this power relationship is really important to its survival. Keith really thrives on Stephen's weakness and submission. We can see this as they investigate the room.
'He can see that my courage is beginning to falter again...' The noun 'courage' is associated with bravery and heroic action. This is something Stephen aspires to but is rarely able to attain. But it is a quality expected from him in this mission from Keith. The verb 'falter' describes Stephen's weakness. The adverb 'again' tells readers this is not the first time Stephen has acted in a cowardly way before Keith. It is this weakness in Stephen that makes Keith feel strong about himself and able to exert power and control over Stephen.

So at first as we read the novel we see an innocent and playful relationship. Then we realize there are tensions and differences - Stephen's desire to be heroic and differences in their characters. However by the end of the novel we realize that their friendship has been manipulated and cultivated by Mrs. Hayward to help her care for Uncle Peter.


FOLLOW UP TASKS

Have a go at planning and or writing other analysis questions posted elsewhere on this blog under timed conditions
  • Read and study carefully through the novel and identify about five or six key episodes - between a side or two sides of writing each
    •  that you could use to answer lots of analytical questions
    • identify language features - see above - and there effects on a reader
  • Find references in the novel to young Stephen to where we see him wanting to do the right thing, is completely loyal, law abiding, intelligent, highly imaginative, brave and innocent. 
  • Find quotations in the novel that reveals the two narrative perspectives - that of the older Stephen and that of the young boy.
  • Below are a few quotations from chapters 2 and 3 that I thought I might use for my answer. What do you think of them? How could they be used?
    • 'But where he longed to be was at Keith's house.'
    • 'You must invite him again another time.'
    • 'I feel more strongly than ever the honour of my association with Keith.'
    • 'I'm immediately excited, because I can see all kinds of interesting new possibilities.....'