A2 LL - RADIO DOCUMENTARY SCRIPT - SOME KEY FEATURES

Voices
I recommend using between 2 or 3 voices maximum for your short script. This will create variety and this will be interesting to any listeners - your audience. It's also a commentary opportunity to show that you are aware of the genre convention of radio broadcasts.

 Layout
Examiners are concerned primarily with the text of your script. They will focus most of their attention on the main body of the text. However a simple wide margin will enable you to write simple notes under a heading like 'Conventions / Speaker'  and then the main body of your text in the rest of the page.

Conventions
Consider such things as main presenter, witness / expert witness / member of the public, sound effects, direct address to the audience, title music, historic evidence - like past news bulletins or extracts of interviews,

 

Use one or a maximum of two sound effects in your recast text. Perhaps use one at the beginning and one at the end of your extract. Remember that you are being assessed on your use of written language; however one very clear way of getting marks is to identify the genre of a recast text. One straight forward way of achieving this is to adopt its layout and the conventions - a way in which something is usually done. By quoting the conventions of a recast text you will be preparing for a good commentary paragraph. For example

Conventions / Speaker	Text
Voice of invigilator announcing the start of an exam. Sound of shuffling students /  papers	The time is now 9.30 this exam lasts two and a half hours. You can turn over the question paper now
Jeremy Paxman – [Presenter]	Well it’s that time of year again where all over the country students are sitting their exams. I have with me in the studio today……..

Commentary extract

I used a recording of the start of an exam to draw the listener’s attention to the subject matter of the documentary. I wrote this declarative in note form because it’s part of the convention of radio script writing, ‘Sound of shuffling students /  papers’ to make the programme sound realistic and to add tension for the listeners. I thought the sound effects would draw their attention.

Have a look at the way sound effects are used in the example documentary script I’ve reproduced.

But remember not to spend very much time on the layout and conventions. It says in the assessment objectives, ‘Convincing use of form with sustained evidence of audience and purpose being addressed. ‘ The term ‘form’ here relates to layout and conventions. The references to ‘audience and purpose’ will be dealt with using language.

I think if you use the margin in the answer book of the exam to place conventions and speaker information , that would be enough.


Click here for a link to a radio documentary script. Notice the layout of the script is different from the one above. Perhaps you'd prefer to use this layout.

A2 LL - RECASTING QUESTION - SLIMEBALLS ALWAYS HATE A STRONG WOMAN BY JULIIE BIRCHILL

Read the source material which follows and answer both questions:

Text A is from an article entitled [] by [Slimeballs Always Hate a Strong Woman by Julie Birchill]
It was first published in [The Times in 2004]

You are [part of a Margret Thatcher support group or fan club who are raising money to build a Margret Thatcher memorial statue. You have been asked to write the text of a leaflet promoting this memorial and persuading people to donate money]


Using the source material, write the [text of the leaflet]

 Your audience will consist of [a general adult audience]

You should adapt the source material, using your own words as far as possible. Your [leaflet] should be approximately 300 – 400 words in length.

In your adaptation you should:

• use language appropriately to address purpose and audience

• write accurately and coherently, applying relevant ideas and concepts.

(25 marks)

 AND

Question 3

Write a commentary which explains the choices you made when writing your commentary must comment on the following:

• how language and form have been used to suit audience and purpose

• how vocabulary and other stylistic features have been used to shape meaning and

 achieve particular effects.

You should aim to write about 150 – 250 words in this commentary.

(15 marks)


Click here for a link to some good clips of Margret Thatcher.

Click here for a link to a Julie Birchill interview

Click here finally for one of Thatcher's iconic moments and a bit more

A2 LL - QUESTION ON JACQUELINE KENNEDY BY KATHERINE ANN PORTER

Read the source material which follows and answer both questions:
Text A is from an article entitled [Jacqueline Kennedy]by [Katherine Ann Porter]

It was first published in [Ladies’ Home Journal in 1964].
You  [have been asked to script the introductory voiceover that will introduce a radio documentary about the life of Jacqueline Kennedy.]
You should adapt the source material, using your own words as far as possible. Your [script] should be approximately 300 – 400 words in length.
In your adaptation you should:

• use language appropriately to address purpose and audience

• write accurately and coherently, applying relevant ideas and concepts.
(25 marks)
AND
Question 3
Write a commentary which explains the choices you made when writing your [script]
commenting on the following:
• how language and form have been used to suit audience and purpose

• how vocabulary and other stylistic features have been used to shape meaning and
achieve particular effects.
You should aim to write about 150 – 250 words in this commentary.
(15 marks)




Click here forr an extract of film footage on Jacqueline Kennedy

IB STANDARD ENGLISH

PAPER 1 UNPREPARED COMMENTARY

EXAM CHECK LIST

EXAM TIMETABLE / ESSAY STRUCTURE

	ACTIVITY	ACTION
3	Skim read texts	Decide which passage to write on. Read the opening and or closing paragraph / stanza. Read the guide questions. Which genre appeals to you?
2	Read guide questions	Once you’ve decided on the text read the guide questions carefully. Go over them more than once. They will help you focus AND structure your essay. They will prescribe to you the approach you must take in your answer.
15	First reading	Read text and annotate ·         identify plot and structure of extract ·         identify narrative voice* ·         Identify key themes or ideas linked to the guide questions ·         Notice the settings** ·         Identify main characters ·         What do you notice about the writing style***
5	Second reading	Close reading. Identify key quotations that illustrate the points you have identified in the first reading. Select carefully what quotations to use. Use quotations that you can write three or four different comments on the quotation. Identify patterns in the text. Consider the relationships between different features of the text, for example the relationship between action and words spoken, character and setting, theme and narrator.
5	Plan	Draw up a list of 8-15 bullet points – just a word or phrase, these are the core of a paragraph or paragraphs. Decide what the most important feature of the text is. For example the main character, a key theme or idea, Number the bullet points. Number the most important point first. That will be your first paragraph and so on.
50	Write	Write the introduction first. Your essay summarised. Present an argument about the text – an underpinning observation. State plot. List your key points – no quotations. List the key literary features that are used in the text. Then begin with your main point. You’ll feel confident about writing about this. And go on writing the second main point and third and so on. Cross the points out in your plan as you write. Avoid writing your   commentary in chronological order. You don’t have to think what to write you have done that work. Concentrate on expression of ideas. Write clear and simple and straightforward points. If a new idea comes to you while writing – add it to your plan and write it as a footnote at the end of the essay. Don’t disturb the flow. Keep writing.
5-10	Reread and edit	Read essay over. Check plan. Have you included all main points? Check for spelling, expression, punctuation. Write up footnotes.

* Is the narrative voice in the 1^{st, 2nd} or 3^rd person? If third person restricted or all knowing, all seeing. There may be references to an imagined audience -2^nd person. This is a direct address to an audience.

** Setting includes physical environment; interior, exterior, light, dark, morning, evening, city, country, weather, furniture, physical / geographical features

***See glossary of some key literary terms

STRUCTURE OF PARAGRAPH

1	Main point	State simple main point of paragraph
2	Introduce quote or put quote in context	Elaborate on the main point by going into detail. And or put the quotation in context – where in the passage, what has happened
3	Quotation	Select a short quotation, a word or a phrase that you can write a lot about.
4	General comment	Link quotation to the main point of the paragraph
5	Literary comment	Identify the literary feature used in the quotation
6	Effect comment	What is the effect of this technique on the generalised reader
7	Attitude comment	Attitudes expressed through character or narrator
8	Connotations / Denotations	Define key words in the quotation. Comment on relevant associations to the word

IB - PAPER 2 MOCK EXAM FEEDBACK

Some General Observations

• Remember that there are at least a hundred plays on the prescribed list to choose from and many more possible couplings of plays to choose to write on. Therefore examiners may not know the plays you've chosen very well. However Translations and Streetcar are two very popular plays.

• Read the questions carefully - sometimes examples of concepts are given but you do not need to be restricted to these alone. They are only examples. In your exam - generosity and selfishness were offered as examples of opposing motivations. However you were not limited to these two concepts.

• Make sure you spend some time considering all three plays and how you can apply these key concepts in the broadest and most inclusive way possible.

• Remember to identify some important comparative observations as you plan.

  

• Define the key concepts in your introduction and relate these concepts to the two plays you are going to write about - this will be a summary /overview of your argument.

• Make sure that you refer explicitly to dramatic conventions and or literary techniques in your answer, such as - monologue, dramatic irony, expressionistic techniques, symbolism and climax.

• Make sure you refer in specific detail to specific scenes in the play. And where possible actually quote, words or phrases from the plays you are writing about.

• And remember that if you quote then refer to specific dramatic conventions or literary techniques and their impact on us as an audience.

• Where relevant and appropriate make clear comparative observations between the two texts.

• Remember there are five criterion used to mark your essay. Each criterion is worth 5 marks. They are marks to indicate:

• the depth of knowledge and understanding you have of the two plays in relation to the question

• how well you have responded to the specific demands of the question - this relies on careful reading of the question, planning and practicing questions

• appropriate and relevant use of dramatic conventions / literary techniques - relies on the detail of your analytical response

• how well you have structured and organised your essay - this relies on planning

• how clear, varied and accurate is your language - this relies on you using an appropriate formal, academic register, good vocabulary, varied syntax and appropriate terminology

IB - PAPER ONE MOCK EXAM FEEDBACK

General Observations

• Address directly and explicitly the guide questions in your introduction by giving a concise but detailed summary or overview of your answer.
• Structure your commentary by using the guide questions as headings for your answer
• Every paragraph must address an aspect of the guide question
• Use quotations as evidence to support the assertions you are making
• Only use short quotations - ideally a word or short phrase of between two and five relevant words
• Each analytical paragraph must contain an assertion, followed by evidence - a quotation - and finally comments on the quotation that will include: identifying language features and comments about their function and intended impact on a reader.
• Failure to do this will result in you only describing the extract rather than analysing it. Therefore you will only achieve a maximum of 2 / 5 marks for criterion 2
• Only use quotations if you are going to analyse the language features of the quotation
• Write clear, concise paragraphs using a formal academic register. Use appropriate technical terms where relevant and appropriate

• You could refer to audience, purpose[s] and genre in your introduction and develop these in detail in your main commentary 

Prose specific points

Make it clear to the examiner that you are answering a question about a work of prose. Do this by making specific reference to prosaic features such as sentences, paragraphs, characterisation, narrator and plot.

Here is a brief list of the techniques and terms relevant to this extract, most of which I'd expect to find in your analysis:

aysyndectic listing,
direct address,
list of three,
direct address,
first and second person personal pronouns
exaggerated politeness features,
low frequency lexis,
hyperbole,
repetition,
alliteration,
pre modifying adjectives and adverbs
repetition of the prefix 'un'
complex declaratives,
short, simple declaratives,
cliches
Latin usage
abstraction


Poetry specific points

Make it clear to the examiner that you are answering a question about a poem. You can do this by making references to specific poetic conventions, such as stanzas, rhyme and metre.


Here is a brief list of techniques and terms, relevant to this poem, some if not most of which I'd expect to find in your answer.

narrative poem
child's narrative perspective
first person narrator
restricted / biased perspective but also
childhood memory from an adult perspective
prosaic style
simile
metaphor
alliteration
sibilance
sensuous language
syntactic parallelism
long, complex declarative sentences
short,simple declarative sentences
high frequency lexis
formal register
some informal phrases
contrasts - fire night /sleep play / children / adults / poverty wealth  

A2 LL - QUESTION - NET PROPHET

You should read and make relevant notes on the whole article. However we are going to concentrate on the text from ‘On the top floor of building eight’ on page 341 to ‘ I’d have moved in a different direction' on page 344.



Read the source material which follows and answer both questions:

Text A is from an article entitled [Net Prophet]by [Leslie White]
It was first published in the [Sunday Times in 1995].

Use the section of the text from ‘On the top floor of building eight’ on page 341 to ‘ I’d have moved in a different direction' on page 344.

You [have been asked to contribute to a radio programme about ‘men of vision’, by scripting a section about Bill Gates. produce the opening text for your section.]

You should adapt the source material, using your own words. Your [script] should be approximately 300 – 400 words in length.

In your adaptation you should:

• use language appropriately to address purpose and audience

• write accurately and coherently, applying relevant ideas and concepts.

(25 marks)

AND

Question 3

Write a commentary which explains the choices you made when writing your [script]
commenting on the following:

• how language and form have been used to suit audience and purpose

• how vocabulary and other stylistic features have been used to shape meaning and
achieve particular effects. 


You should aim to write about 150 – 250 words in this commentary.


(15 marks)


A recent programme on Radio 4 - Desert Island Discs - featured Bill Gates. It includes some biographical details and some of his favorite music. Click here for a link to the programme. 

A2 LL - QUESTION - POOR IMMORTAL ISADORA

Read the source material [the whole article] which follows and answer both questions:

Text A is from an article entitled [Poor Immortal Isadora]by [Dorothy Parker]
It was first published in the [New Yorker in January 1928]

You [have been asked to produce the opening section of an online encyclopaedia page about Isadora Duncan]

You should adapt the source material, using your own words. Your [online encyclopaedia page] should be approximately 300 – 400 words in length.

In your adaptation you should:

• use language appropriately to address purpose and audience

• write accurately and coherently, applying relevant ideas and concepts.

(25 marks)

AND

Question 3

Write a commentary which explains the choices you made when writing your[online encyclopaedia page] commenting on the following:

• how language and form have been used to suit audience and purpose

• how vocabulary and other stylistic features have been used to shape meaning and
achieve particular effects.

You should aim to write about 150 – 250 words in this commentary.

(15 marks)





Click here for a youtube clip about Isadora Duncan


Click here for a link to a website about Isadora Duncan - it could act as an online encyclopaedia article about her.


Click here for a brief article on how to write an encyclopaedia

A2 LL - NOTE FOR WEEK BEGINNING 14 MARCH

Here is just a reminder that we'll be covering two articles next week.

 

They are:

 

Net Prophet by Leslie White on page 339

 

and

 

Poor Immortal Isadora by Dorothy Parker on page 316

 

You should read and make notes on the significant content of both articles. Consider what possible recasting tasks could be set on them. And read and consider the exam questions posted on this blog.

 

If there are any follow up links on these posts then pend some time considering the wider context of these articles.

 

• Make sure you are on time for the start of the lesson.
• Bring your copy of Cupcakes and Kalashnikovs to the lesson.
• And finally read and makes notes on both articles

A2 LL - QUESTION - DIANA REGINA

Read the source material which follows and answer both questions:


Text A is an extract from an article entitled [Diana Regina] by [Camille Paglia]

It was first published in [New Republic in 1992].

You are a [a curator of an exhibition about Diana at the Victoria and Albert museum]

Using the source material, from The pagan goddess page 335 to  the end of The Hollywood queen on page 337; write the text of an information display board introducing a section of the exhibition titled Diana's Private Life and Public Persona.]

Your audience will consist of [people interested in the royal family and particularly the life of Diana.]

You should adapt the source material, using your own words as far as possible. Your text
should be approximately 300 – 400 words in length.

 In your adaptation you should:

• use language appropriately to address purpose and audience

• write accurately and coherently, applying relevant ideas and concepts.

(25  marks)

AND

Question 3

Write a commentary which explains the choices you made when writing the text of your museum introduction text commenting on the following:

• how language and form have been used to suit audience and purpose

• how vocabulary and other stylistic features have been used to shape meaning and
achieve particular effects.

You should aim to write about 150 – 250 words in this commentary.

(15 marks)

IB Exam Unseen Checklist

IB STANDARD ENGLISH

PAPER 1 UNPREPARED COMMENTARY

EXAM CHECK LIST

 

EXAM TIMETABLE / ESSAY STRUCTURE

 

	ACTIVITY	ACTION
3	Skim read texts	Decide which passage to write on. Read the opening and or closing paragraph / stanza. Read the guide questions. Which genre appeals to you?
2	Read guide questions	Once you’ve decided on the text read the guide questions carefully. Go over them more than once. They will help you focus on the relevant features of the text
15	First reading	Read text and annotate ·         identify plot and structure of extract ·         identify narrative voice* ·         Identify key themes or ideas ·         Notice the settings** ·         Identify main characters ·         What do you notice about the writing style***
5	Second reading	Close reading. Identify key quotations that illustrate the points you have identified in the first reading. Select carefully what quotations to use. Use quotations that you can write three or four different comments on the quotation.   Identify patterns in the text. Consider the relationships between different features of the text, for example the relationship between action and words spoken, character and setting, theme and narrator.
5	Plan	Draw up a list of 8-15 bullet points – just a word or phrase, these are the core of a paragraph or paragraphs. Decide what the most important feature of the text is. For example the main character, a key theme or idea, Number the bullet points. Number the most important point first. That will be your first paragraph and so on.
50	Write	Write the introduction first. Your essay summarised. Present an argument about the text – an underpinning observation. State plot. List your key points – no quotations. List the key literary features that are used in the text.   Then begin with your main point. You’ll feel confident about writing about this. And go on writing the second main point and third and so on. Cross the points out in your plan as you write. Avoid writing your commentary in chronological order.   You don’t have to think what to write you have done that work. Concentrate on expression of ideas. Write clear and simple and straightforward points. If a new idea comes to you while writing – add it to your plan and write it as a footnote at the end of the essay. Don’t disturb the flow. Keep writing.
5-10	Reread and edit	Read essay over. Check plan. Have you included all main points? Check for spelling, expression, punctuation. Write up footnotes.

 

 

* Is the narrative voice 1^st or 3^rd person narrator. If third person restricted or all knowing,

all seeing.

** Setting includes physical environment; interior, exterior, light, dark, morning, evening,

city, country

***See glossary of some key literary terms

 

 

STRUCTURE OF PARAGRAPH

 

1	Main point	State simple main point of paragraph
2	Introduce quote or put quote in context	Elaborate on the main point by going into detail. And or put the quotation in context – where in the passage, what has happened
3	Quotation	Select a short quotation, a word or a phrase that you casn write a lot about.
4	General comment	Link quotation to the main point of the paragraph
5	Literary comment	Identify the literary feature used in the quotation
6	Effect comment	What is the effect of this technique on the generalised reader
7	Attitude comment	Attitudes expressed through character or narrator
8	Connotations / Denotations	Define key words in the quotation. Comment on relevant associations to the word

A2 LL - COMPARATIVE ANALYTICAL PARAGRAHS FOR THE BIRDS THREE WAY COMPARISON

Text A and text B both present birds as violent and aggressive. In text A the avocets are described as 'behaving like hooligans'. The anthropomophic use of 'hooligans' introduces a humour into the programme. The comparison emphasises the informal, conversational relationship between the presenters and their audience.

Text B presents the hawk as a powerful predator. His whole function is to kill, eat and maintain control of his environment. This is done in the fourth stanza. 'I kill where I please because it is all mine.' The repetition of the personal and possesive pronouns, 'I' and 'mine' is used to emphasise physical and mental power and strength. The verb 'kill' is shocking and reveals the brutality and cruelty of the hawk. It's a serious and sinister short simple declarative statement that contrasts with the light hearted presentation of the avocets.

 

A2 LL - QUESTION PUTTING HER BEST FACE on a MURKY BUSINESS

Read the source material which follows and answer both questions:


Text A is from an article entitled [Putting Her Best Face on a Murky Business]by [Eleanor Mills]
It was first published in [the Sunday Times in October 1999].


You  [have been asked to produce the section of Bhutto’s obituary, focussing on this period of her life in the UK. Your work is intended for publication in a broadsheet newspaper.]


You should adapt the source material, using your own words. Your [obituary]
should be approximately 300 – 400 words in length.


In your adaptation you should:
• use language appropriately to address purpose and audience
• write accurately and coherently, applying relevant ideas and concepts.


(25 marks)


AND


Question 3


Write a commentary which explains the choices you made when writing your[text]
commenting on the following:
• how language and form have been used to suit audience and purpose
• how vocabulary and other stylistic features have been used to shape meaning and
achieve particular effects.


You should aim to write about 150 – 250 words in this commentary.


(15 marks)


Click here for a link to a guide on how to write an obituary


Click here for an encyclopaedia entry for Benazir Bhutto


Click here for a poor quality and brief youtube clip showing Bhutto's assassination 


Click here for a link to a radio 4 programme of obituaries called Last Word


Click here for an example of a recent written obituary published in the Guardian

A2 LL - QUESTION TALLULAH BANKHEAD

Read the source material which follows and answer both questions:


Text A is from an article entitled [Tallulah Bankhead] by [Gladys Hall]

It was first published in [Motion Picture in September 1932].


You  []
You should adapt the source material, using your own words. Your []
should be approximately 300 – 400 words in length.


In your adaptation you should:
• use language appropriately to address purpose and audience
• write accurately and coherently, applying relevant ideas and concepts.


(25 marks)


AND


Question 3


Write a commentary which explains the choices you made when writing your[text]
commenting on the following:


• how language and form have been used to suit audience and purpose


• how vocabulary and other stylistic features have been used to shape meaning and
achieve particular effects.


You should aim to write about 150 – 250 words in this commentary.


(15 marks)

UNIT 3 SECTION A

ANALYTICAL COMPARISON


Read the three texts on the following pages. These three texts are all about place.


Text A is the opening of the novel 1984 by George Orwell.
Text B is an extract from a non-fiction text.
Text C is a transcript of an adult talking about a recent holiday.


Compare texts A, B and C, analysing how the writers and the speaker communicate their impressions of the places they are writing about.


Your analysis should include a consideration of the following:

• The writer’s or speakers’ choices of vocabulary, grammar and style
• The relationships between texts and the significance of the context on language use.
(60 marks)

A2 LL - A SUMMARY OF CUPCAKES POSTS

You can access this blog by typing David's Teaching Blog into google or type www.davidsteachingblogone.blogspot.com into your browser

You'll find here at present - over 30 different posts to help you study and revise the Cupcakes articles. 

• I've posted mock questions on a variety of Cupcakes texts. 
• I've also posted notes on a variety of relevant recast formats. 
• Some of these include links to examples of recast formats and links to guides on how to write these formats. 
• I've also posted lists of linked articles to help you structure your reading of the articles.
• And I've posted the mark scheme for the recast task and the recast commentary.

Please let me know if there are other posts you would like to see on this exam unit.

I will be adding to these posts - including model answers and notes on specific articles over the coming months until the exam.

I will also be posting posts on the three way comparison commentary over the next few months until the exam.

Please make use of the detailed glossary of key terms especially devised for this unit of the exam. Click here for a link to the page.