INTRODUCTION
Click here for a link to a table of core analytical terms covering all analytical frameworks.
Click here for a link to a glossary of analytical terms, definitions and examples
CORE SPOKEN LANGUAGE TERMS
CORE LANGUAGE TERMS
GRAMMAR
Identify verbs, nouns and adjectives.
Refer to proper nouns, concrete and abstract nouns
Refer to verbs and adverbs
Refer to adjectives - pre / post modifying, comparative and superlative
LEXIS
Refer to denotation and connotation
Refer to low frequency and high frequency lexis
Refer to monosyllabic and polysyllabic lexis
Refer to lexical fields
REGISTER
Refer to informal and formal registers
SYNTAX
Refer to simple, compound and complex sentences.
Refer to declaratives, interrogatives, imperatives and exclamatives
CORE LITERATURE TERMS
Imagery - metaphor, simile, personification, symbolism, pathetic fallacy,
CORE POETRY TERMS
Refer to form - stanza, metre, free verse, sonnet, quatrain
Refer to
CORE RHETORICAL TERMS
CORE WRITING STYLES
Refer to descriptive and reflective writing.
Refer to dialogue.
Refer to action writing.
Friday, 22 May 2015
Thursday, 21 May 2015
IB ENGLISH SL - EXAMPLE OTHELLO QUESTION
Comment on the significance of this exchange between Desdemona, Cassio and Emilia. You might like to explore ideas of dramatic irony, the role of a wife and women in general, the presentation of Cassio or any other features that interest you.
The garden of the castle.
Enter DESDEMONA, CASSIO, and EMILIA.
DESDEMONA Be thou assured, good Cassio, I will do
All my abilities in thy behalf.
EMILIA Good madam, do: I warrant it grieves my husband,
As if the case were his.
DESDEMONA O, that's an honest fellow. Do not doubt, Cassio,
But I will have my lord and you again
As friendly as you were.
CASSIO Bounteous madam,
Whatever shall become of Michael Cassio,
He's never any thing but your true servant.
DESDEMONA I know't; I thank you. You do love my lord:
You have known him long; and be you well assured
He shall in strangeness stand no further off
Than in a polite distance.
CASSIO Ay, but, lady,
That policy may either last so long,
Or feed upon such nice and waterish diet,
Or breed itself so out of circumstance,
That, I being absent and my place supplied,
My general will forget my love and service.
DESDEMONA Do not doubt that; before Emilia here
I give thee warrant of thy place: assure thee,
If I do vow a friendship, I'll perform it
To the last article: my lord shall never rest;
I'll watch him tame and talk him out of patience;
His bed shall seem a school, his board a shrift;
I'll intermingle every thing he does
With Cassio's suit: therefore be merry, Cassio;
For thy solicitor shall rather die
Than give thy cause away.
EMILIA Madam, here comes my lord.
CASSIO Madam, I'll take my leave.
DESDEMONA Why, stay, and hear me speak.
CASSIO Madam, not now: I am very ill at ease,
Unfit for mine own purposes.
DESDEMONA Well, do your discretion.
The garden of the castle.
Enter DESDEMONA, CASSIO, and EMILIA.
DESDEMONA Be thou assured, good Cassio, I will do
All my abilities in thy behalf.
EMILIA Good madam, do: I warrant it grieves my husband,
As if the case were his.
DESDEMONA O, that's an honest fellow. Do not doubt, Cassio,
But I will have my lord and you again
As friendly as you were.
CASSIO Bounteous madam,
Whatever shall become of Michael Cassio,
He's never any thing but your true servant.
DESDEMONA I know't; I thank you. You do love my lord:
You have known him long; and be you well assured
He shall in strangeness stand no further off
Than in a polite distance.
CASSIO Ay, but, lady,
That policy may either last so long,
Or feed upon such nice and waterish diet,
Or breed itself so out of circumstance,
That, I being absent and my place supplied,
My general will forget my love and service.
DESDEMONA Do not doubt that; before Emilia here
I give thee warrant of thy place: assure thee,
If I do vow a friendship, I'll perform it
To the last article: my lord shall never rest;
I'll watch him tame and talk him out of patience;
His bed shall seem a school, his board a shrift;
I'll intermingle every thing he does
With Cassio's suit: therefore be merry, Cassio;
For thy solicitor shall rather die
Than give thy cause away.
EMILIA Madam, here comes my lord.
CASSIO Madam, I'll take my leave.
DESDEMONA Why, stay, and hear me speak.
CASSIO Madam, not now: I am very ill at ease,
Unfit for mine own purposes.
DESDEMONA Well, do your discretion.
A2 LL - CUPCAKES RECAST FORMATS - DOCUMENTARY RADIO SCRIPTS
RECAST FORMATS - Radio
script
Definition: A
radio documentary or feature is a purely acoustic performance devoted to
covering a particular topic in some depth, usually with a mixture of commentary
and sound pictures. It is broadcast on radio or published on audio media, such
as tape or CD.
Example of radio
documentary script
PASSAIC ON STRIKE (2006)
NARRATOR: FEW PEOPLE ARE STILL AROUND TO REMEMBER, BUT IN
1926, INPASSAIC NEW JERSEY, 16 THOUSAND WOOLWORKERS STRUCK THEMILLS AFTER THEIR
MEAGER WAGES HAD BEEN CUT. THE STRIKELASTED NEARLY A YEAR. SUPPORTERS ACROSS
THE NATION SENT MONEY AND FOOD.
NARRATOR: THE 19 TWENTIES ROARED ALRIGHT, BUT NOT THE WAY MOST
PEOPLETHINK. COMING UP AFTER THE NEWS, A DOCUMENTARY: PASSAIC ON STRIKE!
Instrumental of 'in'TWe
Got Fun'
THE BATTLEGROUND
FUNDING ANNOUNCER: THE FOLLOWING PROGRAM IS A CO-PRODUCTION OF NJN
PUBLIC RADIO AND THE NEW JERSEY HISTORICAL COMMISSION. FUNDING FOR THISPROGRAM
WAS PROVIDED BY THE NEW JERSEY COUNCIL FOR THEHUMANITIES, A STATE PARTNER OF
THE NATIONAL ENDOWMENT FORTHE HUMANITIES, AND THE HISTORICAL COMMISSION. THE
VIEWSEXPRESSED IN THIS PROGRAM DO NOT NECESSARILY REFLECT THOSEOF THE COUNCIL,
THE HISTORICAL COMMISSION OR NEW JERSEY NETWORK.
Street ambiance. Crowd scene.
Milling crowd, a bit threatening. At a distance. Car doors being slammed. A
tiny little bit of talking.
JOHN DOS PASSOS: At the place where the meeting was going to be
forbidden the people from New
York got out of the shiny
sedans of various makes. The sheriff was a fat man with a badge like a star off
a Christmas tree. The cops were waving their clubs about, limbering up their
arms .³All right move ‘em along,´ said
the sheriff. The people who had come from New York climbed back into the shiny
sedans of various makes and drove away. The procession went back the way it had
come, down empty streets, past endless facades of deserted mills, past brick
tenements with ill-painted stoops, past groups of squat square women with
yellow gray faces, groups of men and boys, standing still, saying nothing,
looking nowhere, square hands hanging at their sides, people square and still,
chunks of yellow gray stone at the edge of a quarry, idle, waiting, on strike.
John Dos Passos.
DEE GARRISON: Well, the nineteen twenties is presented as a time of
gayety and short skirts and short hair and lots of women dancing around Like,
people were supposed to have had money and fun. But the reality of the twenties
is that it was a very huge gap between the rich and the poor.
[Bring up music and lyrics
again.]
There’s nothing purer, the
rich get richer and the poor get children. In the meantime, in between time,
ain’t we got fun.
NARRATOR: THE 1920’S ROARED ALRIGHT, WITH THE SIREN OF
INJUSTICE. THE REDSCARE, LYNCHINGS, AND THE LABOR WARS.NOWHERE WAS THIS BATTLE,
BETWEEN THE HAVES AND HAVE NOTSMORE BRUTAL THAN IN PASSAIC, NEW JERSEY 15 MILES
WEST OFMANHATTAN. HERE, IN 1926, 16 THOUSAND WOOLWORKERS WALKEDOUT AFTER THEIR
MEAGER WAGES HAD BEEN CUT 10%. IT WAS A LONGSTRIKE -- NEARLY A YEAR -- AND IT
CAUGHT THE ATTENTION OF INTELLECTUALS AND ACTIVISTS NATIONWIDE. OVER THE
HARSHWINTER OF 1926, PASSAIC BECAME A BATTLEGROUND, NOT JUSTBETWEEN WORKERS AND
BOSSES, BUT BETWEEN THE TRADITIONALTRADE UNIONS AND A RENEGADE ORGANIZER IN THE
AMERICANCOMMUNIST PARTY, WHO ENVISIONED A MILITANT, INDUSTRIAL UNIONFOR ALL
WORKERS.
NOW THE STORY OF.´PASSAIC ON
STRIKE!
JIM SHENTON: I was born in Passaic. I lived either in Passaic or
in Clifton most of my life.
[Eastern European music
begins.]
NARRATOR: THE LATE JAMES SHENTON WAS A LEGENDARY HISTORIAN
ANDTEACHER AT COLUMBIA UNIVERSITY. HE ONCE RECALLED THATIMMIGRANT CULTURE WAS
SO STRONG IN PASSAIC, NEW JERSEY. ITWAS LIKE LIVING IN EASTERN EUROPE.
JAMES SHENTON: My grandmother -- who came in 1878 and died in 1931
-- never learned to speak English. She didn’t have to. She could speak
Hungarian, because that was partof the fact of being born in Hungary, Slovak --
if you know Slovak, you more or less know Czech you knew Polish. She picked up
German. By the time she got here, she knew enough languages that English was
sort of an impediment. In away, it becomes a world in which the stalla babbas
-- the old women -- the old grandmas -- wearing the babushkas -- was part of
the normal life of this town. My mother’s family came from the area of Slovakia
which is called the Spisarea. This was an area that had apparently some kind of
influx of Germans, and it was an area of what was then the Kingdom of Hungary
in which wool production wasan aspect of their daily lives.
NARRATOR: IN PASSAIC DAILY LIFE WAS DOMINATED BY TWO WOOLEN
MILLS-- THE BOTANY AND THE FORSTMANN AND HUFFMANN, BOTH GERMANOWNED. IN 1890
CONGRESS HAD PASSED A TARIFF THAT MADE ITPROHIBITIVELY EXPENSIVE TO IMPORT
WOOL, SO THE GERMANSOPENED MILLS HERE.
JIM SHENTON: When World War One began, the Alien Custodian
Commission seized control of the factories that were German-owned
NARRATOR: AND WHO EXACTLY WAS PUT IN CHARGE?
JAMES SHENTON: American
officers. When World War One ended, Colonel Charles Johnston, who had been in charge
of the Botany Woollen Mills, effectively began fighting to gain control. The Germans
began fighting for regaining control, and this began to reflect itself in working
conditions. The working class got caught in between in these fights. Wages began to come down, and this is where it
gets really uneasy. The Bolshevik element came in. And the CP became a fact of
life in this area.
[The Red Army singing ³ The
Internationale.´]
NARRATOR: IN THE WAKE OF THE 1917 BOLSHEVIK REVOLUTION IN
RUSSIA, THEFLEDGLING COMMUNIST PARTY IN AMERICA, THE CP, OFFERED AN ALTERNATE
VISION FOR THE WORKING CLASS IN PASSAIC. TO THEUNASSIMILATED IMMIGRANTS,
COMMUNISM WAS NOT A FRIGHTENINGFOREIGN IDEOLOGY, RATHER A WAY TO GAIN CONTROL
OF THEIRLIVES. THE RED SCARE DIDN¶T SCARE THEM.
PAUL BUHLE: There was a tremendous wave of government-inspired,
but also conservative, propaganda.
NARRATOR: PAUL BUHLE, SENIOR LECTURER IN AMERICAN CIVILIZATION
AT BROWN UNIVERSITY.under which the Russian
Revolution, for instance, was described as having nationalized women, and which
the atheistic quality of the new Russian leadership was played up as an attack
on God. And through which all respectable, God-fearing and monogamous Americans
were told that they had to resist Communism, because otherwise there would be
God-less triumph and no sexual morality.
NARRATOR: MANY YOUTHFUL AMERICAN IDEALISTS WHOSE SYMPATHIES
LAY WITHLOW-PAID WORKERS DIDN’T BUY THE RED SCARE, EITHER. SOME JOINED THE
YOUNG COMMUNIST LEAGUE.
RADIO DOCUMENTARY SCRIPT - SOME USEFUL TIPS TO USE
Voice
Use more than one voice.
I’d recommend an announcer / main presenter and a second
voice.
Two typical structures:
A –
divide the script into two voices. One voice presenting one subject and voice
two presenting a second subject. For example, speaker A presents Bill Gates’s
private life and biography and speaker two presents Bill Gates’s professional life.
I’d recommend that the two voices present short presentations each and then
repeat until complete.
B –
divide the script into two voices using an interview format. One voice the
interviewer and a second voice the interviewee. It’s really important to have
the interviewer ask short simple open questions that enables the interviewee to
present all or most of the relevant information from the source text.
Layout
Most radio scripts have the page divided into two columns.
The first column is used to identify who is speaking and the second column contains
the script. Sometimes rows are inserted to add sound effects or music or voice
overs. You could easily present your script like this
|
|
|
|
Jeremy Paxman [Interviewer]
|
So David, in your opinion, how do A Level students survive
their exams?
|
|
David Loffman
[interviewee]
|
Preparation and practice are the two most important
factors in a successful exam period.
|
|
Jeremy Paxman [Interviewer]
|
I know that you’ve been a successful lecturer now for 28
years. Could you tell our listeners some practical advice about how to
prepare and practice for their exams.
|
|
David Loffman
[interviewee]
|
Well students often feel out of control when facing exams.
They often feel that it is a process in which something unpleasant is being
done to them and that they are powerless
and quite passive.
It is right that they are going to experience a relatively
short period of time of intense prescribed activity where they have very
rigid and limited choices to make. But I feel they should take every
opportunity to control as much of the situation they can.
|
|
Jeremy Paxman [Interviewer]
|
Like what for example
|
|
David Loffman
[interviewee]
|
Students can write an exam time table. For example allocating
specific time to particular activities. For example, at 9.30 read the SECTION
B question and annotate the extract. At 9.45 write a bullet point plan based
on the question and annotations. At 9.50 write the recast task. At 10.10 plan
the commentary and at 10.15 write your commentary. Then at 10.30 read the
SECTION A question……..
|
Conventions
Use a maximum of two sound effects in your recast text. Perhaps use one at the beginning and one at the end of your extract. Remember that you are being assessed on your use of written language; however one very clear way of getting marks is to identify the genre of a recast text. One straight forward way of achieving this is to adopt its layout and the conventions - a way in which something is usually done. By quoting the conventions of a recast text you will be preparing for a good commentary paragraph. For example
Conventions / Speaker
|
Text
|
Voice of invigilator announcing the start of an exam. Sound of shuffling students / papers
|
The time is now 9.30 this exam lasts two and a half hours. You can turn over the question paper now
|
Jeremy Paxman – [Presenter]
|
Well it’s that time of year again where all over the country students are sitting their exams. I have with me in the studio today……..
|
Commentary extract
I used a recording of the start of an exam to draw the listener’s attention to the subject matter of the documentary. I wrote this declarative in note form because it’s part of the convention of radio script writing, ‘Sound of shuffling students / papers’ to make the programme sound realistic and to add tension for the listeners. I thought the sound effects would draw their attention.
Have a look at the way sound effects are used in the example documentary script I’ve reproduced.
But remember not to spend very much time on the layout and conventions. It says in the assessment objectives, ‘Convincing use of form with sustained evidence of audience and purpose being addressed. ‘ The term ‘form’ here relates to layout and conventions. The references to ‘audience and purpose’ will be dealt with using language.
I think if you use the margin in the answer book of the exam to place conventions and speaker information , that would be enough.
SOME FOLLOW UP WORK
RADIO SCRIPTS - Read the example radio script above and identify conventions, key features, identify how the text addresses audience and purpose, uses genre conventions and creates specific effects from an audience.
KEY FEATURES - RADIO SCRIPTS can include a really wide range of different formats, audiences, purposes and topics. For gthe purpose of the exam simplicity is the best policy to adopt where possible. Don't worry too much about how the script looks but really try and communicate specifically to an audience, adopting the basic format ideas referred to above using the appropriate purpose. Remember the content of the source article is the primary information to be addressed.
CONVENTIONS – a way in which something is usually done –such as structure, layout, address heading[s]
COMMENT – on function[s] of the convention within the context of the
TEXT - Link to audience, purpose, genre, wider context, attitudes to topic[s]and topic[s]themselves
EFFECT – identify the intended effect of the CONVENTION on an audience / reader
LANGUAGE FEATURES - identifylanguage and literary features common to RADIO SCRIPTS. Find a good quotation - short and contains strong language features - comment on these and show effects on readers.
FOLLOW UP
READ and become familiar with RADIO SCRIPTS. You will find many examples online. They are usually relatively short, accessible and on interesting topics. Avoid drama scripts and focus on documentaries.
Identify a 300 - 400 extract and identify conventions, language features, good quotations, make brief comments about function of the language feature and on effects on readers.
SOME FOLLOW UP WORK
KEY FEATURES - RADIO SCRIPTS can include a really wide range of different formats, audiences, purposes and topics. For gthe purpose of the exam simplicity is the best policy to adopt where possible. Don't worry too much about how the script looks but really try and communicate specifically to an audience, adopting the basic format ideas referred to above using the appropriate purpose. Remember the content of the source article is the primary information to be addressed.
COMMENT – on function[s] of the convention within the context of the
TEXT - Link to audience, purpose, genre, wider context, attitudes to topic[s]and topic[s]themselves
EFFECT – identify the intended effect of the CONVENTION on an audience / reader
LANGUAGE FEATURES - identifylanguage and literary features common to RADIO SCRIPTS. Find a good quotation - short and contains strong language features - comment on these and show effects on readers.
FOLLOW UP
READ and become familiar with RADIO SCRIPTS. You will find many examples online. They are usually relatively short, accessible and on interesting topics. Avoid drama scripts and focus on documentaries.
Identify a 300 - 400 extract and identify conventions, language features, good quotations, make brief comments about function of the language feature and on effects on readers.
Click here for a link to website about scripting radio documentaries. It's not written for us but it does include some useful information.
Click here for a link to a Cupcakes post that asks you to write a radio documentary script.
Tuesday, 19 May 2015
IB ENGLISH SL EXAM AND COMMENTARY ARRANGEMENTS
The Exam
The arrangements for the IB SL English exam are as follows:
The exam will take place on Monday 8 June in room 1E1 at 9.00. It is a two hour exam and you should expect to arrive for the exam at least 10 minutes before the exam is due to start.
The exam consists of two questions. You should expect to spend an hour per question.
One question will be on Othello. You must answer the question with close detailed analysis to the extract provided.
The second question will be on The Great Gatsby. You must answer the question with close detailed analysis to the extract provided.
The purpose of the exam is to give students practical experience of sitting an IB English exam. The model of this exam will be similar to the oral commentary you will be doing at the end of this academic year as well as giving you some experience of the exam questions you will experience next summer.
The exam result will help - along with other assessments - to allocate a predicted grade in English for students.
Some Links
Below are some links to posts you might find helpful in preparing for the exam [and commentary].
Click here for the basics about the exam and analysis.
Click here and here for terms you can use in your analysis.
Click here for further details of terms you can use for your analysis.
Click here and here and here for some examples of analytical paragraphs. Consider the structure of these rather than the actual content of the paragraphs.
The Commentary
The arrangements for the IB SL English commentary will be posted here as details are finalised:
The commentaries will take place in the last teaching week of the year. The week beginning 22nd June. The commentaries will take place over two days between Tuesday 23 - Thursday 25 June.
You will be given the extract by an exam assistant and shown to a room where you can prepare your presentation independently and without interruption by annotating the text and making a plan.
Students will have 20 minutes to prepare a 10 minute presentation - including some follow up questions from me; on a specific extract either from Othello or The Great Gatsby. The presentation must include a close detailed analysis of the extract provided.
The commentary will be recorded, marked, internally moderated and then some recordings will be externally moderated by the IB. Marks from the commentary out of 30 - 15% of your overall English grade and presentation - marked out of 30 - 15% of your overall English grade - will be carried forward into the second year assessment of the course - 70% of your overall English grade.
The arrangements for the IB SL English exam are as follows:
The exam will take place on Monday 8 June in room 1E1 at 9.00. It is a two hour exam and you should expect to arrive for the exam at least 10 minutes before the exam is due to start.
The exam consists of two questions. You should expect to spend an hour per question.
One question will be on Othello. You must answer the question with close detailed analysis to the extract provided.
The second question will be on The Great Gatsby. You must answer the question with close detailed analysis to the extract provided.
The purpose of the exam is to give students practical experience of sitting an IB English exam. The model of this exam will be similar to the oral commentary you will be doing at the end of this academic year as well as giving you some experience of the exam questions you will experience next summer.
The exam result will help - along with other assessments - to allocate a predicted grade in English for students.
Some Links
Below are some links to posts you might find helpful in preparing for the exam [and commentary].
Click here for the basics about the exam and analysis.
Click here and here for terms you can use in your analysis.
Click here for further details of terms you can use for your analysis.
Click here and here and here for some examples of analytical paragraphs. Consider the structure of these rather than the actual content of the paragraphs.
The Commentary
The arrangements for the IB SL English commentary will be posted here as details are finalised:
The commentaries will take place in the last teaching week of the year. The week beginning 22nd June. The commentaries will take place over two days between Tuesday 23 - Thursday 25 June.
You will be given the extract by an exam assistant and shown to a room where you can prepare your presentation independently and without interruption by annotating the text and making a plan.
Students will have 20 minutes to prepare a 10 minute presentation - including some follow up questions from me; on a specific extract either from Othello or The Great Gatsby. The presentation must include a close detailed analysis of the extract provided.
The commentary will be recorded, marked, internally moderated and then some recordings will be externally moderated by the IB. Marks from the commentary out of 30 - 15% of your overall English grade and presentation - marked out of 30 - 15% of your overall English grade - will be carried forward into the second year assessment of the course - 70% of your overall English grade.
A2 ENGLISH LANGUAGE AND LITERATURE - ARRANGEMENTS AFTER HALF TERM
Classes will continue after half term although there will be no formal register's taken.
I will continue to be avalable to meet and discuss exam issues with you. I'll bring to class or post selected material on the blog covering topics including looking at spoken language transcripts, spoken language terminology,language and literary technical terms, recast formats and recast commentaries.
i'll put all work i've marked into my tray in 1D11 and I will continue to mark work that students hand in. The marked work can be picked up from my tray in 1D11. These can be picked up at any time or collected from me during a lesson where you might get some 1:1 feedback. I'll put the marked work in labelled folders with module and student details on the cover.
If you want me to address a specific topic for the exam then let me know and we'll discuss it in class. If you email me in good time before hand I can prepare materials, I expect.
Remember to read the comments and check the blog for specific feedback.
Don't forget to use the blog for recast questions and tips for the three way comparison and the recast task.
Use your time wisely.
David
I will continue to be avalable to meet and discuss exam issues with you. I'll bring to class or post selected material on the blog covering topics including looking at spoken language transcripts, spoken language terminology,language and literary technical terms, recast formats and recast commentaries.
i'll put all work i've marked into my tray in 1D11 and I will continue to mark work that students hand in. The marked work can be picked up from my tray in 1D11. These can be picked up at any time or collected from me during a lesson where you might get some 1:1 feedback. I'll put the marked work in labelled folders with module and student details on the cover.
If you want me to address a specific topic for the exam then let me know and we'll discuss it in class. If you email me in good time before hand I can prepare materials, I expect.
Remember to read the comments and check the blog for specific feedback.
Don't forget to use the blog for recast questions and tips for the three way comparison and the recast task.
Use your time wisely.
David
Monday, 18 May 2015
IB COMMENTARY QUESTION AND EXTRACT
How is Tom presented in this extract from the novel?
And so it happened that on a warm windy evening I drove over to East Egg to see two old friends whom I scarcely knew at all. Their house was even more elaborate than I expected, a cheerful red-and-white Georgian Colonial mansion, overlooking the bay. The lawn started at the beach and ran toward the front door for a quarter of a mile, jumping over sun-dials and brick walks and burning gardens — finally when it reached the house drifting up the side in bright vines as though from the momentum of its run. The front was broken by a line of French windows, glowing now with reflected gold and wide open to the warm windy afternoon, and Tom Buchanan in riding clothes was standing with his legs apart on the front porch.
He had changed since his New Haven years. Now he was a sturdy straw-haired man of thirty with a rather hard mouth and a supercilious manner. Two shining arrogant eyes had established dominance over his face and gave him the appearance of always leaning aggressively forward. Not even the effeminate swank of his riding clothes could hide the enormous power of that body — he seemed to fill those glistening boots until he strained the top lacing, and you could see a great pack of muscle shifting when his shoulder moved under his thin coat. It was a body capable of enormous leverage — a cruel body.
His speaking voice, a gruff husky tenor, added to the impression of fractiousness he conveyed. There was a touch of paternal contempt in it, even toward people he liked — and there were men at New Haven who had hated his guts.
“Now, don’t think my opinion on these matters is final,” he seemed to say, “just because I’m stronger and more of a man than you are.” We were in the same senior society, and while we were never intimate I always had the impression that he approved of me and wanted me to like him with some harsh, defiant wistfulness of his own.
We talked for a few minutes on the sunny porch.
And so it happened that on a warm windy evening I drove over to East Egg to see two old friends whom I scarcely knew at all. Their house was even more elaborate than I expected, a cheerful red-and-white Georgian Colonial mansion, overlooking the bay. The lawn started at the beach and ran toward the front door for a quarter of a mile, jumping over sun-dials and brick walks and burning gardens — finally when it reached the house drifting up the side in bright vines as though from the momentum of its run. The front was broken by a line of French windows, glowing now with reflected gold and wide open to the warm windy afternoon, and Tom Buchanan in riding clothes was standing with his legs apart on the front porch.
He had changed since his New Haven years. Now he was a sturdy straw-haired man of thirty with a rather hard mouth and a supercilious manner. Two shining arrogant eyes had established dominance over his face and gave him the appearance of always leaning aggressively forward. Not even the effeminate swank of his riding clothes could hide the enormous power of that body — he seemed to fill those glistening boots until he strained the top lacing, and you could see a great pack of muscle shifting when his shoulder moved under his thin coat. It was a body capable of enormous leverage — a cruel body.
His speaking voice, a gruff husky tenor, added to the impression of fractiousness he conveyed. There was a touch of paternal contempt in it, even toward people he liked — and there were men at New Haven who had hated his guts.
“Now, don’t think my opinion on these matters is final,” he seemed to say, “just because I’m stronger and more of a man than you are.” We were in the same senior society, and while we were never intimate I always had the impression that he approved of me and wanted me to like him with some harsh, defiant wistfulness of his own.
We talked for a few minutes on the sunny porch.
IB COMMENTARY QUESTION AND EXTRACT
Examine this extract and comment on its significance to the novel as a whole. You might like to focus on Nick's reactions to Tom and Jordan.
The Buchanans’ house floated suddenly toward us through the
dark rustling trees. Tom stopped beside the porch and looked up at the second
floor, where two windows bloomed with light among the vines.
“Daisy’s home,” he said. As we got out of the car he glanced
at me and frowned slightly.
“I ought to have dropped you in West Egg, Nick. There’s
nothing we can do to-night.”
A change had come over him, and he spoke gravely, and with
decision. As we walked across the moonlight gravel to the porch he disposed of
the situation in a few brisk phrases.
“I’ll telephone for a taxi to take you home, and while
you’re waiting you and Jordan better go in the kitchen and have them get you
some supper — if you want any.” He opened the door. “Come in.”
“No, thanks. But I’d be glad if you’d order me the taxi.
I’ll wait outside.”
Jordan put her hand on my arm.
“Won’t you come in, Nick?”
“No, thanks.”
I was feeling a little sick and I wanted to be alone. But
Jordan lingered for a moment more.
“It’s only half-past nine,” she said.
I’d be damned if I’d go in; I’d had enough of all of them
for one day, and suddenly that included Jordan too. She must have seen
something of this in my expression, for she turned abruptly away and ran up the
porch steps into the house. I sat down for a few minutes with my head in my
hands, until I heard the phone taken up inside and the butler’s voice calling a
taxi. Then I walked slowly down the drive away from the house, intending to wait
by the gate.
Friday, 15 May 2015
A2 LL - CUPCAKES QUESTION ON THE SUMMER I LEFT CHILDHOOD WAS WHITE - EDITORIAL
Read the source material from ['I wanted to eat...' on page 111 to '... my father was quite progressive.' on page 112] and answer both questions:
Text A is from an article entitled [The Summer I Left Childhood was White] by [Audre Lorde]. It was first published in the [Zami: A New Spelling of My Name].
Using the article [you have been asked to write an editorial on the injustices of racism. The paper you write for is actively campaigning and supporting civil rights.
Adapt the source material, using your own words as far as possible. Your [editorial] should be approximately 300 – 400 words in length.
In your adaptation you should:
• use language appropriately to address purpose and audience
• write accurately and coherently, applying relevant ideas and concepts.
(25 marks)
AND
Question 3
Write a commentary which explains the choices you made when writing your [editorial]commenting on the following:
• how language and form have been used to suit audience and purpose
• how vocabulary and other stylistic features have been used to shape meaning and
achieve particular effects.
You should aim to write about 150 – 250 words in this commentary.
(15 marks)
Text A is from an article entitled [The Summer I Left Childhood was White] by [Audre Lorde]. It was first published in the [Zami: A New Spelling of My Name].
Using the article [you have been asked to write an editorial on the injustices of racism. The paper you write for is actively campaigning and supporting civil rights.
Adapt the source material, using your own words as far as possible. Your [editorial] should be approximately 300 – 400 words in length.
In your adaptation you should:
• use language appropriately to address purpose and audience
• write accurately and coherently, applying relevant ideas and concepts.
(25 marks)
AND
Question 3
Write a commentary which explains the choices you made when writing your [editorial]commenting on the following:
• how language and form have been used to suit audience and purpose
• how vocabulary and other stylistic features have been used to shape meaning and
achieve particular effects.
You should aim to write about 150 – 250 words in this commentary.
(15 marks)
Thursday, 14 May 2015
IB ENGLISH - EXAM CHECKLIST
IB ENGLISH
END OF YEAR EXAM
What are the details of the exam?
2 hour exam
1 question on Othello – with one short extract
1 question on Gatsby – with one short extract
I suggest 1 hour per question
· 10 minutes reading annotating extracts – underline key quotations that illustrate important points about the guide question, plot, character, theme, setting etc.
· 5 minutes planning time – organizing thoughts into a series of bullet points generally in the order you will write your answer
· 35 minutes writing the essay – include an introduction, a series of coherent analytical paragraphs followed by a brief concluding statement
· 10 minutes correcting and editing – add new points and correct spelling, grammar and syntax
What am I looking for?
· Close reading and detailed analysis – make a simple point, expand on point in detail, introduce quotation, quote and comment – identify language feature[s] in quote, identify its function and comment on the effect on reader / audience
· Overall knowledge of the characters, plot, themes, setting of the text as a whole – show awareness of events that immediately precede and immediately follow the extract. Identify the significance of details within the extract to events that precede the extract. As well as identify the significance of details within the extract that foreshadows events that follow.
· Ability to address the guide question directly – show an ability to focus on and respond to the topic identified in the guide question
What details should I include in the essay?
Comment on writing styles
· For example: descriptive writing – evoking place, objects character by using modifiers, adjectives, elemental and sensuous lexis,
· narrative writing – story telling, the gradual unfolding of events with use of flashbacks, flash forwards and present tense narratives, be aware of narrative perspectives
· dialogue – be aware of formal / informal register and accent [Americanisms], be aware of idiolects, idiomatic language
· action writing – episodes that involve crisis, dominated by verbs and adverbs
· reflective writing – internal monologues reflecting on episodes and characters, or refection on relevant abstract concepts
Comment on context
· Refer to where in the text this extract is located
· Refer to relevant episodes that lead up to this extract
· Refer where relevant to cultural, political, social issues linked to the publication of the text
· Refer where relevant to Shakespeare an or Fitzgerald’s life
Comment on character
· Refer to attitudes and motivations that prompt behaviour and speech.
· What do words, actions and other literary features reveal to us about character[s]
Comment on narrator / speaker for example consider such things as
· First or third person narrator
· Biased or trustworthy
· Limited or overall knowledge
Comment on language features
· Identify language terms – for example consider:
o Grammar – nouns – concrete / abstract / proper nouns, adjectives – superlatives and comparatives, verbs -
o Syntax - simple, compound and complex sentences as well as declaratives, interrogatives, imperatives and exclamatives
o Register – formal and informal
o Lexis – low and high frequency lexis, semantic fields, denotation and connotation Imagery - simile, metaphor, personification, symbolism
o Phonology – alliteration, assonance, onomatopoeia, rhyme
o Rhetorical devices – such as comparative / contrasting pairs, direct address, lists of three, repetition,
· What is the function of these techniques within the text
· What is the intended effect on reader / audience
Comment on setting
· How does setting contribute to themes and characters
END OF YEAR EXAM
What are the details of the exam?
2 hour exam
1 question on Othello – with one short extract
1 question on Gatsby – with one short extract
I suggest 1 hour per question
· 10 minutes reading annotating extracts – underline key quotations that illustrate important points about the guide question, plot, character, theme, setting etc.
· 5 minutes planning time – organizing thoughts into a series of bullet points generally in the order you will write your answer
· 35 minutes writing the essay – include an introduction, a series of coherent analytical paragraphs followed by a brief concluding statement
· 10 minutes correcting and editing – add new points and correct spelling, grammar and syntax
What am I looking for?
· Close reading and detailed analysis – make a simple point, expand on point in detail, introduce quotation, quote and comment – identify language feature[s] in quote, identify its function and comment on the effect on reader / audience
· Overall knowledge of the characters, plot, themes, setting of the text as a whole – show awareness of events that immediately precede and immediately follow the extract. Identify the significance of details within the extract to events that precede the extract. As well as identify the significance of details within the extract that foreshadows events that follow.
· Ability to address the guide question directly – show an ability to focus on and respond to the topic identified in the guide question
What details should I include in the essay?
Comment on writing styles
· For example: descriptive writing – evoking place, objects character by using modifiers, adjectives, elemental and sensuous lexis,
· narrative writing – story telling, the gradual unfolding of events with use of flashbacks, flash forwards and present tense narratives, be aware of narrative perspectives
· dialogue – be aware of formal / informal register and accent [Americanisms], be aware of idiolects, idiomatic language
· action writing – episodes that involve crisis, dominated by verbs and adverbs
· reflective writing – internal monologues reflecting on episodes and characters, or refection on relevant abstract concepts
Comment on context
· Refer to where in the text this extract is located
· Refer to relevant episodes that lead up to this extract
· Refer where relevant to cultural, political, social issues linked to the publication of the text
· Refer where relevant to Shakespeare an or Fitzgerald’s life
Comment on character
· Refer to attitudes and motivations that prompt behaviour and speech.
· What do words, actions and other literary features reveal to us about character[s]
Comment on narrator / speaker for example consider such things as
· First or third person narrator
· Biased or trustworthy
· Limited or overall knowledge
Comment on language features
· Identify language terms – for example consider:
o Grammar – nouns – concrete / abstract / proper nouns, adjectives – superlatives and comparatives, verbs -
o Syntax - simple, compound and complex sentences as well as declaratives, interrogatives, imperatives and exclamatives
o Register – formal and informal
o Lexis – low and high frequency lexis, semantic fields, denotation and connotation Imagery - simile, metaphor, personification, symbolism
o Phonology – alliteration, assonance, onomatopoeia, rhyme
o Rhetorical devices – such as comparative / contrasting pairs, direct address, lists of three, repetition,
· What is the function of these techniques within the text
· What is the intended effect on reader / audience
Comment on setting
· How does setting contribute to themes and characters
Wednesday, 13 May 2015
A2 LL CUPCAKES QUESTION - A SPEECH
Read the source material which follows and answer both questions:
Text A is from an article entitled [Everybody Wins and All Must Have Prizes] by [Melanie Phillips]. It was first published in the [Daily Mail in 2003].
Using the article [you have been asked to script a speech urging parents]. to write to their MP demand changes to educational policy. Produce the opening of the speech
Adapt the source material, using your own words as far as possible. Your [speech] should be approximately 300 – 400 words in length.
In your adaptation you should:
• use language appropriately to address purpose and audience
• write accurately and coherently, applying relevant ideas and concepts.
(25 marks)
AND
Question 3
Write a commentary which explains the choices you made when writing your [leaflet]
commenting on the following:
• how language and form have been used to suit audience and purpose
• how vocabulary and other stylistic features have been used to shape meaning and
achieve particular effects.
You should aim to write about 150 – 250 words in this commentary.
(15 marks)
Text A is from an article entitled [Everybody Wins and All Must Have Prizes] by [Melanie Phillips]. It was first published in the [Daily Mail in 2003].
Using the article [you have been asked to script a speech urging parents]. to write to their MP demand changes to educational policy. Produce the opening of the speech
Adapt the source material, using your own words as far as possible. Your [speech] should be approximately 300 – 400 words in length.
In your adaptation you should:
• use language appropriately to address purpose and audience
• write accurately and coherently, applying relevant ideas and concepts.
(25 marks)
AND
Question 3
Write a commentary which explains the choices you made when writing your [leaflet]
commenting on the following:
• how language and form have been used to suit audience and purpose
• how vocabulary and other stylistic features have been used to shape meaning and
achieve particular effects.
You should aim to write about 150 – 250 words in this commentary.
(15 marks)
Monday, 11 May 2015
A2 LL - CUPCAKES QUESTION ON REPORT FROM VIETNAM
Read the source material which follows and answer both questions:
Text A is from an article entitled [Report From Vietnam 1: The Home Programme] by [Mary McCarthy]. It was first published in the [New York Review of Books in 1967].
Using the section from 'The war they say,' on page 27 to 'his office headquarters' on page 30, you [have been asked to create a properganda leaflet for the US public, to reassure them that the US presence in Vietnam is a postive force].
Adapt the source material, using your own words as far as possible. Your [leaflet] should be approximately 300 – 400 words in length.
In your adaptation you should:
• use language appropriately to address purpose and audience
• write accurately and coherently, applying relevant ideas and concepts.
(25 marks)
AND
Question 3
Write a commentary which explains the choices you made when writing your [leaflet]
commenting on the following:
• how language and form have been used to suit audience and purpose
• how vocabulary and other stylistic features have been used to shape meaning and
achieve particular effects.
You should aim to write about 150 – 250 words in this commentary.
(15 marks)
Text A is from an article entitled [Report From Vietnam 1: The Home Programme] by [Mary McCarthy]. It was first published in the [New York Review of Books in 1967].
Using the section from 'The war they say,' on page 27 to 'his office headquarters' on page 30, you [have been asked to create a properganda leaflet for the US public, to reassure them that the US presence in Vietnam is a postive force].
Adapt the source material, using your own words as far as possible. Your [leaflet] should be approximately 300 – 400 words in length.
In your adaptation you should:
• use language appropriately to address purpose and audience
• write accurately and coherently, applying relevant ideas and concepts.
(25 marks)
AND
Question 3
Write a commentary which explains the choices you made when writing your [leaflet]
commenting on the following:
• how language and form have been used to suit audience and purpose
• how vocabulary and other stylistic features have been used to shape meaning and
achieve particular effects.
You should aim to write about 150 – 250 words in this commentary.
(15 marks)
Wednesday, 6 May 2015
AS LL - GROUP PLANNING TASK
TASK
In small groups prepare one of the SECTION A Analysis questions below.
Write a detailed plan and share it with the other groups in the class
Spies – Michael Frayn
How does Frayn convey a sense of Stephen’s naivety?
Choose two or three extracts to explore in detail
In your answer you should consider:
• Frayn’s language choices
• narrative viewpoint
Spies – Michael Frayn - January 2013
How does Frayn present Keith's father?
Choose two or three extracts to explore in detail
In your answer you should consider:
• Frayn’s language choices
• narrative viewpoint
A Streetcar Named Desire – Tennessee Williams
Explore how Williams presents the relationship between Stella and Blanche.
Choose two or three extracts to explore in detail
In your answer you should consider:
• Williams’s language choices
• dramatic techniques
A Streetcar Named Desire – Tennessee Williams - January 2013
How does Williams present Blanche’s fantasy and delusion?
Choose two or three extracts to explore in detail.
In your answer you should consider:
In small groups prepare one of the SECTION A Analysis questions below.
Write a detailed plan and share it with the other groups in the class
Spies – Michael Frayn
How does Frayn convey a sense of Stephen’s naivety?
Choose two or three extracts to explore in detail
In your answer you should consider:
• Frayn’s language choices
• narrative viewpoint
Spies – Michael Frayn - January 2013
How does Frayn present Keith's father?
Choose two or three extracts to explore in detail
In your answer you should consider:
• Frayn’s language choices
• narrative viewpoint
A Streetcar Named Desire – Tennessee Williams
Explore how Williams presents the relationship between Stella and Blanche.
Choose two or three extracts to explore in detail
In your answer you should consider:
• Williams’s language choices
• dramatic techniques
A Streetcar Named Desire – Tennessee Williams - January 2013
How does Williams present Blanche’s fantasy and delusion?
Choose two or three extracts to explore in detail.
In your answer you should consider:
- Williams’s language choices
- dramatic techniques.
AS LL - ANALYSIS QUESTION - SOME BASICS AND TEMPLATE
SECTION A - ANALYSIS TASK - SOME BASICS
Spend 40 minutes on this section
There are 30 marks available for this part of the exam
I suggest you spend 10 - 15 minutes planning, 20 - 25 minutes writing and 5 - 10 minutes reading, editing and correcting your answer
In the analysis question you are being assessed on your ability to - [AO 1] to show you can choose relevant linguistic and literary concepts and terminology to analyse the text.
15 marks
[AO 2] And your ability to show in detail that you understand and can analyse the ways in which form (the novel), structure (the organisation of events for effect), and language (used in narrative - story telling, descriptive language, dialogue and reflective language - Stephen's internal monologues ) are used to create effects / impact.
15 marks
A TEMPLATE ANSWER
Brief introduction - answer the question in summary - no quotations, jot down a list of the key points you are going to explore in detail in the rest of your answer. Make a summary comment about language features and narrative perspective
Write a series of 3 - 5 analytical paragraphs in which you:
Finally write a concluding statement - this will be a sentence or two at most. You can summarise the main points of your answer, make an interesting observation or give a final concluding comment.
Spend 40 minutes on this section
There are 30 marks available for this part of the exam
I suggest you spend 10 - 15 minutes planning, 20 - 25 minutes writing and 5 - 10 minutes reading, editing and correcting your answer
In the analysis question you are being assessed on your ability to - [AO 1] to show you can choose relevant linguistic and literary concepts and terminology to analyse the text.
15 marks
[AO 2] And your ability to show in detail that you understand and can analyse the ways in which form (the novel), structure (the organisation of events for effect), and language (used in narrative - story telling, descriptive language, dialogue and reflective language - Stephen's internal monologues ) are used to create effects / impact.
15 marks
A TEMPLATE ANSWER
Brief introduction - answer the question in summary - no quotations, jot down a list of the key points you are going to explore in detail in the rest of your answer. Make a summary comment about language features and narrative perspective
Write a series of 3 - 5 analytical paragraphs in which you:
- make an assertion - an important short simple declarative statement that you feel confident in making that is completely relevant to the question
- use a good quotation - a word or a phrase that contains at least two language features that you feel confident in identifying
- identify two or three language features - depending on time limits - choose one or two language features in your quotation and
- comment on the effect of these on a reader - this could include: feeling sympathy for a character, creating emphasis, highlighting conflict and creating atmosphere
- comment on narrative viewpoint - you don't have to do this for every paragraph but mention it in your introduction and at least two other paragraphs
Finally write a concluding statement - this will be a sentence or two at most. You can summarise the main points of your answer, make an interesting observation or give a final concluding comment.
Tuesday, 5 May 2015
A2 LL - CUPCAKES QUESTION - WHAT BECAME OF THE FLAPPERS
Read the source material which follows and answer both questions:
Text A is from an article entitled [What Became of the Flappers] by[Zelda Fitzgerald]
It was first published in [Mc Call’s Magazine in October 1925].
You [have been asked to contribute to an encyclopaedia of popular culture by producing an entry on the idea of the Flapper].
Using the source material [as a whole you should] adapt the source material, using your own words as far as possible. Your [encyclopaedia] entry should be approximately 300 – 400 words in length.
In your adaptation you should:
• use language appropriately to address purpose and audience
• write accurately and coherently, applying relevant ideas and concepts.
(25 marks)
AND
Question 3
Write a commentary which explains the choices you made when writing your [text]
commenting on the following:
• how language and form have been used to suit audience and purpose
• how vocabulary and other stylistic features have been used to shape meaning and
achieve particular effects.
You should aim to write about 150 – 250 words in this commentary.
(15 marks)
Text A is from an article entitled [What Became of the Flappers] by[Zelda Fitzgerald]
It was first published in [Mc Call’s Magazine in October 1925].
You [have been asked to contribute to an encyclopaedia of popular culture by producing an entry on the idea of the Flapper].
Using the source material [as a whole you should] adapt the source material, using your own words as far as possible. Your [encyclopaedia] entry should be approximately 300 – 400 words in length.
In your adaptation you should:
• use language appropriately to address purpose and audience
• write accurately and coherently, applying relevant ideas and concepts.
(25 marks)
AND
Question 3
Write a commentary which explains the choices you made when writing your [text]
commenting on the following:
• how language and form have been used to suit audience and purpose
• how vocabulary and other stylistic features have been used to shape meaning and
achieve particular effects.
You should aim to write about 150 – 250 words in this commentary.
(15 marks)
Monday, 4 May 2015
A2 LL - MOCK EXAM FEEDBACK
A2 LL - MOCK EXAM FEEDBACK
THREE WAY COMPARISON
Some positive observations
RECAST TASK AND COMMENTARY
It was the most awful experience of my life. That first night out in the open with my wife and children was absolutely tortuous.
The rain pounded on us all night. I can barely bring myself to think about such horror.
We only had one dirty and smelly blanket for the seven of us, my wife, her mother and aunt, and our three children. We kept the children in the middle of us to stop the rain from falling on them. The blanket just covered us all. But my wife's and my back were saturated by the morning. We tried to sing the children to sleep. We tried to tell them stories. We tried to remind them about our last holiday we had by the sea. But they were so cold and hungry after our three day journey to this barren mountainside.
What a place! It felt as if we'd been abandoned by God. There was nothing there we could use. There was no natural shelter. There were a few scattered stunted trees but they had been stripped of anything useful when we were there. There was no clean water. There was a small muddy and polluted stream close by and muddy puddles. The place was an open sewer. It got everywhere. It was mixed into the mud
The mud got everywhere! It was in our hair, in our eyes, our clothes and the little food we had.
In the morning when I got up I saw Turkish soldiers laughing and smoking cigarettes. They had automatic weapons slung over their shoulders and whips in their hands. I saw one turn to a young couple. He was shouting at them and raised his whip. The soldiers are so cruel and unhelpful.
In that grey light of the morning I tried to dig a hole to use as a toilet. But I was pushed away by a family that had settled close by. Beside the ground was to stony and exposed.
But what I remember most about that first morning was the unnatural silence. There were the occasional screams of children. But when those died away there was a strange hush. It was the silence of a defeated, helpless and despairing people that had nowhere to go.
Commentary
I wrote this first hand autobiographical account of life in a Turkish refuge camp to inform the readers of a book chronicling the horrors of the Saddam Hussain regime. I used a direct quotation from the article as the title to give an impression of the content of the article to follow. And the more detailed declarative sub-heading is used to give the reader a context and brief explanation to the article.I imagine my readers would be victims and survivors of his brutal government. And perhaps people sympathetic to the Kurdish campaign for an independent state. It's written also to raise awareness of the plight of the Kurdish people.
I used pre-modifying adjectives to help give vivid detail for example, 'dirty and smelly'. This sensuous language is used to create a realistic and gritty impression of the situation.
I used syntactic parallelisms as a way of generating a strong emotional response from the readers and to emphasise the desperate situation. The repetition of the phrase, 'There was no....' also reinforces the helplessness. The phrase, 'we tried to...' is used to help readers contrast the lives these people lived before they came to the mountainside. It's also used to highlight the vulnerability of the children.
I used short simple declaratives and exclamatives such as, 'What a place!' and 'There was no shelter! to shock readers and draw their attention.
THREE WAY COMPARISON
SOME GENERAL ISSUES
Some positive observations
- Most of you used the recommended structure for the commentary and this was used well, generally
- Most students used a sound core of language and literary features. The best scripts were using between 15 - 20 different features.
- Students generally drew from language, literary and spoken language frameworks with degrees of confidence
- Comparing texts for the most was an absolutely embedded feature of your commentaries
- Commentaries were generally well written with accurate expression and confident use of terminology
- Most scripts addressed audience, purpose(s), genre, attitude(s) to main topic and identified at least one sub-topic
- Most scripts commented in detail on the effects of language features on readers / audience
Some negative observations
- Analysis of texts was mostly sound but rarely insightful and sensitive. For example students did not pick up on Jane's nervousness or anxiety in text A or pick up on the cynical, anger and bitterness of Ben in text C.
- Only a relatively small number of students made comments about semantic fields. This seemed such an obvious area to explore and all three texts use subject specific lexical choices. Associated with a semantic field of medical conditions is low-frequency lexis and formal register.
- Very few scripts commented on the headmaster in text C or identified the dialogue at the start or the imagined dialogue at the end of the extract
- Referring to contexts was almost completely ignored by most students
- Identifying audiences is not a formulaic tick box exercise especially for novels. You must be thorough and engaged. For example, 'The audience for the novel may include people interested in discrimination and human rights. Or people interested in injustice or disability.
Some general observations to consider
- Really pack every line with concise, detailed and relevant points. You can do this by using quotations that have two or three language features that you can confidently comment on in some detail. And then refer to the effects.
- The most effective quotations are short. A word or a phrase works best.
- Perhaps we should avoid including - repeating the basic information about texts in the introduction. For example for text A we could write,'Text A is an interactional, private, spontaneous, informal series of adjacency pairs between two work colleagues, discussing the medical condition of one of the speakers.'
- The examiners expected students to identify gender as a topic to discuss. Text A male and female, text B's lack of gender and text C's male to male gender.
- Examiners expected students to identify speech in text's A and C; direct address in text B.
- Examiners expected students to refer to lexical issues including low and high frequency lexis as well as formal and informal registers
- use detailed language frameworks
- Text A some observations include: The extract is a series of adjacency pairs, Malcolm sets the agenda, uses back-channelling features to show he understands Jane's explanations, non-fluency features may be an indication of informality or expressions of discomfort and awkwardness about talking about such a sensitive subject. Both speakers use non-fluency features.This may be indicated by the fact the dialogue is set at work and are primarily colleagues - not necessarily close friends.
- Text B some observations include:
- Text C some observations include: What struck me about this extract is the attitude of the narrator / main character to his medical condition and the world generally. He is angry and bitter. This has led to a cynical view of the things. This is expressed through sarcasm and irony. These are examples of dark or black humour. It's entertaining but it's also quite painful.
- FOLLOW UP TASKS
SOME GENERAL POINTS - RECAST TEXT
- There are 28 recasting questions on this blog. If you practice 3 or 4 of these a week under timed conditions between now and the exam, you will improve your writing and commentary skills. The more you do, the better you will become at writing these two exam tasks. You have the skills and the opportunity to get 40 / 40 for this exam. I will mark any work that you submit to me. It is your responsibility. Act now to transform a D grade into a B grade! It's as simple as that!
- Include references from the beginning, middle and end sections of the source text
- Try and include at least two minor or apparently insignificant details from the source text.
- Over 90% of your recast task must be directly and specifically drawn from the source text. Less than 10% of your recast text should be used to adapt this material to your recast genre.
- Remember what you are being assessed on. You are being assessed on your ability to 'demonstrate expertise and creativity in using language appropriately for a variety of purposes and audiences, drawing on insights from language and literary studies.' This is a description of the assessment criteria for the recast text.
- Make sure as you write your recast text include relevant and obvious language / literary features that you can use in your commentary. At first when you practice recasting texts this is awkward and artificial but the more you practice the more natural and easier it will become.
- Avoid using the same words and phrases as the source article. This is really important. Use synonyms and alternative phrases. Approach the actual language / expression of the recast text creatively and imaginatively.
- Add a title and sub heading to your text. You can use this to refer to genre and audience.
- SOME GENERAL POINTS - COMMENTARY
- Like the three way comparison use the structure and most of the features in the following list in your recast commentary. Address audience, purpose(s), genre, attitude(s) to topic; then quote relevantly, concisely a quotation from your own recast text, packed with language / literary features, and identify between 10 - 15 language / literary features and comment on the intended effect on readers.
- Unlike the three way comparison question, this is not a comparison exercise. Just answer the question that's asked, carefully.
- Refer to between ten and twenty language and literary terms in your commentary
- Write detailed and concise commentaries.
- Write a minimum of 150 words. If you have time write more than 250 concise, detailed, language and literary filled words and effects on audiences.
- Remember what you are being assessed for in the recast commentary question. You are being assessed on your ability to, 'select and apply relevant concepts and approaches from integrated language and literary study, using appropriate terminology and accurate, coherent written expression.'
A MODEL ANSWER
Recast text
'An Unnatural Silence'
A first hand account of life in a Turkish refugee camp in the Uludere Mountains
Recast text
'An Unnatural Silence'
A first hand account of life in a Turkish refugee camp in the Uludere Mountains
It was the most awful experience of my life. That first night out in the open with my wife and children was absolutely tortuous.
The rain pounded on us all night. I can barely bring myself to think about such horror.
We only had one dirty and smelly blanket for the seven of us, my wife, her mother and aunt, and our three children. We kept the children in the middle of us to stop the rain from falling on them. The blanket just covered us all. But my wife's and my back were saturated by the morning. We tried to sing the children to sleep. We tried to tell them stories. We tried to remind them about our last holiday we had by the sea. But they were so cold and hungry after our three day journey to this barren mountainside.
What a place! It felt as if we'd been abandoned by God. There was nothing there we could use. There was no natural shelter. There were a few scattered stunted trees but they had been stripped of anything useful when we were there. There was no clean water. There was a small muddy and polluted stream close by and muddy puddles. The place was an open sewer. It got everywhere. It was mixed into the mud
The mud got everywhere! It was in our hair, in our eyes, our clothes and the little food we had.
In the morning when I got up I saw Turkish soldiers laughing and smoking cigarettes. They had automatic weapons slung over their shoulders and whips in their hands. I saw one turn to a young couple. He was shouting at them and raised his whip. The soldiers are so cruel and unhelpful.
In that grey light of the morning I tried to dig a hole to use as a toilet. But I was pushed away by a family that had settled close by. Beside the ground was to stony and exposed.
But what I remember most about that first morning was the unnatural silence. There were the occasional screams of children. But when those died away there was a strange hush. It was the silence of a defeated, helpless and despairing people that had nowhere to go.
Commentary
I wrote this first hand autobiographical account of life in a Turkish refuge camp to inform the readers of a book chronicling the horrors of the Saddam Hussain regime. I used a direct quotation from the article as the title to give an impression of the content of the article to follow. And the more detailed declarative sub-heading is used to give the reader a context and brief explanation to the article.I imagine my readers would be victims and survivors of his brutal government. And perhaps people sympathetic to the Kurdish campaign for an independent state. It's written also to raise awareness of the plight of the Kurdish people.
I used pre-modifying adjectives to help give vivid detail for example, 'dirty and smelly'. This sensuous language is used to create a realistic and gritty impression of the situation.
I used syntactic parallelisms as a way of generating a strong emotional response from the readers and to emphasise the desperate situation. The repetition of the phrase, 'There was no....' also reinforces the helplessness. The phrase, 'we tried to...' is used to help readers contrast the lives these people lived before they came to the mountainside. It's also used to highlight the vulnerability of the children.
I used short simple declaratives and exclamatives such as, 'What a place!' and 'There was no shelter! to shock readers and draw their attention.
FOLLOW UP TASKS
- Practice under timed conditions some of the recast question posted elsewhere on this blog
- Read carefully the recasting guide posted elsewhere on this blog
- Develop the range of language and literary frameworks and terms to use in your commentary
- Read over some of the articles we've discussed in class, develop recasting questions of your own and practice writing them under timed conditions.
- Click here for a link to a post about approaches to the recast task
- Select 300 - 400 words from a variety of articles we've looked at over the year and write a 250 - 350 word commentary on it. Write it imagining you wrote the source text.
- And remember - introduction - summary of audience, purpose, genre, attitude to the subject. Then write 3 or 4 paragraphs selecting topics listed above. Make a point, support it with a quotation, identify language features and comment on the effects on an audience. And finally write 2 paragraphs on the topics engaged with in the source text
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